The Comedy Bailout

The Comedy Bailout Update

2010-03-02T18:36:00.001-07:00

Hey trailer tour fans! I stopped posting on this blog so everyone would get the idea that the tour was OVER! Now that I have accomplished ending the tour, HERE'S AN UPDATE!

I have decided to turn my footage into a movie, tentatively titled, "The Comedy Bailout." There is much work to accomplish that, and the level of assets I can bring to the work will ultimately determine the quality of the finished product.

My time will be brought to the work, and I have secured partnership commitments from some very talented production people. I mean VERY talented people. Top of their game folk. I am very hopeful at this point and flattered at the support I have received. I have great hopes knowing who is already helping me that I will finish with something special.

Money? Still no money for the idea, but I am pressing forward and will finish it one way or another AND publish!

When? Good question. Within a year I hope. Still lots to find out about what I need to do.

I am now blogging at appetite4adventure.com. We are still touring in the trailer. We had so much fun we decided to keep going.

2010

2010-01-14T09:29:00.000-07:00

appetite4adventure.com is my new blog. Cheers.

In The End

2009-12-31T11:02:00.440-07:00

Cue the music, roll the credits, turn up the lights... you've seen the show. Today is the last regular blog update on The Comedy Bailout. From here I put together the video and you can watch that, but you won't be looking out my window with me every day as I discover America. Let's recap.

Goal: Sell my stuff and downsize my life into a 17' fiberglass trailer.
Accomplished.

Goal: Hit the road and have unbelievable adventure seeing places and things I've never seen and re-visiting favorites.
Accomplished.

Goal: Do free comedy for people having a hard time and lift their spirits.
Hah, hah. Nope. Tried.

Goal: Create a blog and post regularly so people can "ride along" to boost their spirits and let them join the tour remotely.
Accomplished.

Goal: Get people to get behind the idea and support the tour financially.
Hah, hah. Nope.

Goal: Meet new people, make new friends.
Accomplished.

Goal: Make my life better and other people's lives better.
Accomplished for me.

What I Learned

The biggest thing I learned this year: Generally, everything is about money.

Other lightening bolts:

Family is super important.

Friends are very important.

Making new friends with people from different places and perspectives makes my world bigger.

TV is a drug and everyone is on it.

The internet is the strongest drug known to man at this time.

The life cycle of ideas is spiraling in on itself.

I like dogs.

The best food and drinks are at your friend's house.

I don't need a lot to be happy.

Speed of Life

I liked slowing down.

I've long said that people move at people speed. Your computer gets faster every year but you still cough and sneeze at the same speed. Taking a year and slowing my life back down to "people speed" I saw a different world. I saw a world where freeways, 60 hour work weeks, crowded airports, cement sports arenas, swine flu, road rage, millions of internet hits and greed -- well, just doesn't seem to make much sense. People running at "profit speed" tell me "people speed" doesn't make much sense. I'm sure it doesn't to them.

I've tried both. When I started in show business I was sure I wanted to be famous and lead a jet-set life flying from event to event, getting the red-carpet treatment wherever I went, and enjoying the lifestyle of the rich and famous. I grew up on in a small town in California's Mojave desert, next to Death Valley. I was raised on a military base in a conservative Mormon home. After that, I wanted some sizzle with my steak. Sir, yes sir. Sir, yezzer. Fo shizzle.

I got to taste showbiz. Not all of it, but enough. Too much, probably. I got to go profit speed.

I think the year I re-wired my brain was 2002. 9/11 had just passed when I was hired to report the 2002 Olympics, perhaps one of the largest corporate/governmental undertakings on the globe. Because of my television work, later in that same year I found myself reporting for humanitarian groups and traveling to Cambodia (wow) and then Africa (WOW). I'm pretty sure that's when I fried my brain.

When I met the people in Africa and Cambodia, they were the same as me. They had eyes that blinked like mine and they lived under the same sky as me. They thought I was funny. They also walked 4 miles a day for water and had leprosy, stepped on forgotten land mines, had no medical care. Some of them had machine guns.

Money

While there is enough wealth for everyone, in our global society people die over money. That's our world. It is someone robbing a store and shooting the clerk, it is a superstitious war on drugs breeding violent cartels and imprisoning the citizenry, it is selling a product you know kills people while telling them it doesn't, say cigarettes for example. Wars over resources. Insurance companies refusing to authorize treatment. The list goes on. The things we will do to each other over money scares me. The things we won't do for each other over money scares me too.

The biggest thing I learned this year? Generally, everything is about money. Like they taught me in the news business, you want to know what's happening, follow the money.

By moving into a trailer, camping in free spots, and trying to do free shows I accidently stepped out of the money equation. That's when the money dragon roared and showed itself again to me. Only this time it wasn't in the Third World, it was in the land immune from credit limits, America. I ran head on into money.

Money is everywhere and in the middle of everything.

Where do you live if you are poor in America? I'll tell you what I saw, if you don't have family or a friend to live with, you live in places that aren't good for you, dangerous places, unhealthy places. You live on the fringes. Try to find a free place to camp in a city, especially in a nice area. Not for you.

What happens to the good places? Usually that land has come under private ownership, been developed and then sold off in pieces to the highest bidder. The good places moves farther out from the city to the country. Now those country places become valuable. Starts again. The war for the West isn't over.

Money is a tool, it cannot be your Master, because if your Master is a tool, well, then you're a tool.

Good News

There are a lot of good people out there in America. It's like America's urban legend, almost a cliche, but I found it to be true. I found people willing to help and friendly.

America is beautiful and there is a lot of great land that is still public.

I always felt safe.

Casita builds an excellent product.

There are a lot of great things in life to enjoy.

Adventure also awaits you.

What Holds You Back?

I found it doesn't matter if your idea is the ultimate right idea, as long as you believe it and it will get you going, it will get you somewhere. We never land where we aim, but we don't fly until we try. You learn as you go, and sometimes it is the off-handed conversation in a diner that can become the pivot point of your success. You just don't know when those moments are going to happen, you just gotta show up and listen.

Don't be afraid to step into the unknown, it's where adventure lies. It's our nature to explore, to test the limits and boundaries. Lead the way. Play your part. Help us find the answer.

It all starts again tomorrow.

And so do I.

I think it's like the Beattle's song that goes, "And, in the end, the love you take/ Is equal to the love you make."

Happy New Year fellow adventurers. Thanks for the company.

How Much is Enough?

2009-12-29T15:40:00.000-07:00

How much is enough? That was one of the big questions I proposed at the beginning of this trip. There's the BIG question, and the little question. I feel like I got both my answers. The short answer for me, above some simple requirements for actual survival, I set the pace of my consumption which tells me how much is enough. Consumption answers the bigger question, my body answers the little one.

Returning Value

My little trailer by its shear size (tiny!) has taught me how to demand value from everything. It can't be in this trailer if it isn't doing anything useful, and hopefully it is doing more than one thing! Utility is value, especially in rapidly changing conditions. I never know what I will be confronted with, so if what I carry can be used in multiple situations, it is even more valuable.

I know my consumption; how much water, gas, electricity I use and need. I can figure how long I can stay out by the size of my tanks. If I can use less of it, I can go longer. If I can do more than one thing with an something, I can increase my capabilities without increasing my load.

Same in life. How much do I need? I need to be happy as a person and that has nothing to do with things. It has to do with the necessities of a mentally healthy person. I need family, community, interaction, a chance to test myself and achieve, appreciation. I need life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.

How Much is Enough

I have more than enough to be happy, you probably do too. Expectations that are not met bring unhappiness, so I am careful which expectations I set and which I accept from others. I expect happiness to come from myself because that's where it is determined, in my own mind. Giving up things frees my mind to think about all that is glorious outside my window, that's the pay-off.

Not too long after I started asking myself "How much is enough?" I realized I was asking myself, "How do I get rid of some of this stuff? I've got too much!" Now I wonder if even the "How much is enough?" question doesn't betray my lingering greed. The real question I should be asking?

How much is too much?

Trailer Science

2009-12-28T12:19:00.001-07:00

In 4 short days this blog is over. I will write some pious, boring, end-of-the-year post like every other media outlet (how does some sort of 'Top 10 list of "insert topic"of 2009" sound?), and then it is "pow". This project then moves into the production phase for the DVD and I stop posting my message in a bottle.

I will start another blog, but one that is occasional and not about my daily "experience" and not one that is a job.

It has been a big responsibility trying to document a year's travels so that I can share them. My cameras are battered and used up (Hurray! Used tools mean I did something with them.) but now they need to be replaced. The list of broken gear: 2004 Ford F150 (the antagonist), DSLR, two laptops, hard drive. I've been busy yo. Software needs to be updated.

I am looking forward to not always being on the clock and thinking, "I should be taping."

I won't miss trying to make something work that isn't working like it is supposed to. Arrggghhh! Like your sports team coming in 4th when you know you have real talent. Working hard, but not getting results. How long do you hang in there before you rethink the equation? I imagine you ask yourself that question from time to time, life does that to us. Wisdom is knowing the answer. I like to think about nature, and remember to plant the seeds and tend the garden to get the fruit. Each step is part of the fruit, just a different point on the timeline.

I have to go off now and distill what I saw. This is trailer science! I have to publish the results of my hypothesis, the experiment, what happened and what I discovered.

To see a photo gallery of my frozen holidays click here.

Home for the Holidays

2009-12-26T18:40:00.000-07:00

Christmas finds us home for the holidays, in our tiny snug home, parked in Provo, Utah. The weather outside is frightful, but the company is so delightful, that here we stay, hunkered down in the cold. The holidays can be a difficult time, (just ask Charlie Sheen or Tiger Woods), thankfully ours have been wonderful.

So to you and yours, merry whatever-floats-your-boat. As we look forward to a new year, I am thankful for those of you who come along on the journey and for your support. In a few short days we end this story and start another.

Fishing Buddies

2009-12-22T12:24:00.002-07:00

A buddy of mine told me... You see two old guys get into their boat and head out fishing. They've been fishing together for 20 years and you think to yourself, "I would like to have a fishing buddy for 20 years." The odd thing is, you don't set out to choose a friend like that, it's after going out year after year, and fishing together for 20 years that you find you have a friend like that.

Yesterday we achieved another dream, we attended our RV park Christmas party in the clubhouse. It was awesome. People are interesting everywhere I go. Santa came and I sat on his lap and he asked me if I wanted a new unit for Christmas. That's RV humor, folks. There was plenty of food and friendly people. I got to meet my neighbors and the park owners, and share stories of pipes freezing along with Christmas treats.

In the evening we slipped over to one of my "fishing buddies" homes for the annual Christmas party and sing-a-long. In some sort of weird alternate universe I have spent many years going to an awesome Christmas party hosted by my Jewish friend Larry King and his wife Shawn. We eat and sit around singing Christmas songs. Larry MC's the evening's entertainment which is culled from the guests. He is super funny, seriously. He has some real comedy chops that you don't see on his CNN show. Many talented friends come to this party and do a little something, it really is a Christmas blessing for me. An intimate concert with some super talented people. It's nice.

I appreciate that my life has a broad scope and can include a wide variety of experience, sometimes within a single day. I appreciate my "fishing buddies", who not through any grand design but through spending time with them over and over through the years have brought me great friendship. I appreciate all my friends, old and new. One of the real benefits of this American road trip has been the people.

Hope your holidays are peaceful and joyful.

The Overton Parade

2009-12-21T11:01:00.000-07:00

We waved goodbye to Vince, Cheryl, Miranda and the crew in Pahrump and we continue northto Overton, NV. We have stopped here before, it's a very small town just outside Lake Mead. Since the level of the Lake Mead has dropped so low it has really affected the community because the Overton Beach Marina has been shut down and the boater and fishermen don't pass through much any more.

We did catch the Veteran's Day parade in all its glory. We have caught several parades on this journey, they reveal a lot about the community. This parade started with people sitting on the curb with 5 open lanes of main street. It ended with one open lane and kids filling four lanes waiting for candy thrown from the parade.

This will be our last camp spot before we head further north and into the snow for the holidays. Our last taste of sunshine for the year.

To see all my pictures from Overton, Nevada, click here.

Oatman, AZ: Be Careful What You Feed

2009-12-17T23:16:00.000-07:00

What happens when you use burros in mines, then close the mines and turn the burros loose? Oatman, Arizona knows the answer. You get wild animals that roam the streets and people (tourists) who come and give them carrots. When they don't get enough carrots? The burros run the people down.

In all my travels I have never seen a place like Oatman, AZ. True to Vince and Cheryl's tale, wild burros do indeed freely roam the streets. Though they seem to be tame when they are first approaching people for carrots, after you have fed them they will run your butt down until they are sure they have every last tasty root. They are persistent and strong and seem to have very few social graces.

The town does its best to do the Wild West thing for the tourists with gun fights in the streets and all. There are some interesting places to eat or have a drink. There is a bar that is covered, and I mean covered, in dollars. There are old signs and shops and golden burros to take your picture with.

You can see my photo gallery of Oatman, AZ here.

I've posted lots of pictures of my magic adventure to Oatman, AZ. If you find yourself in Laughlin, NV if might be worth a quick side trip to see the burros. Thanks to Vince, Cheryl and Miranda for taking the time to lead us straight to this amazing place that we never would have found without them.

Video: Dentist in Mexico

2009-12-16T01:00:00.000-07:00

Put together a short video about going to the dentist in Mexico. Nothing fancy, I was busy getting my head drilled. But there are a few pictures here for anyone interested in seeing what it looks like.

Wanna See the Donkeys?

2009-12-15T13:34:00.002-07:00

View Larger Map

Taking US 95 North from Yuma, Arizona through Needles, CA, we drive to Laughlin, Nevada and stop at the Avi Casino Resort and RV Park. It's a long drive, sometimes following the Colorado River. We got there in the evening and snuggled our trailer into the park while our friends checked in to the hotel. Then we met for a late-night dinner in the casino.

While in Arizona Vince and Cheryl teased us with stories of an old mining town turned over to wild burros which freely roamed the streets. Seriously? Oh yes, they told us, it was all very real. Wild burros roaming the streets and the people forbidden to harass them. So they extended their trip and took us off the beaten path to see this mystical, perhaps mythical, town.

This is the magic I thought I would find before I began this trip. I thought I would find people who would unlock a hidden world to me and share new discoveries. But I never expected the level of road trip achievement and honest hospitality shown us by the triker crew, et al. I cannot express in words how awesome they were to us and the gratitude I have for the new experiences they shared with us. To let us tag along with them to Mexico after just meeting us at Beatty Days and then extending their trip and adding expense to take us off to show us something we never would have found on our own. What can I say? Awesome people. We need more of them.

Back to the story... In the morning we meet for a quick run through the swap meet, Vince helps me find a replacement fuse in a booth of nothing but boxes of auto fuses. Then we hit the road and head for Oatman.

A Balmy 36

2009-12-13T19:17:00.000-07:00

"It feels so nice, so warm out," I said today as the temperature hit 36. Amazing how perspective changes depending upon where you are standing. Spent a night in the downtown Salt Lake Marriott after a show, and when we came back the ice was melting off the egg.

I guess I have confused people about my intentions with my tour and blog after the New Year. I am ending this story at that time, the story of my idea to buy a trailer and head out on the road delivering my own comedy stimulus. Then I am going to compile it and tell what happened and what I learned, release the DVD in the spring.

I still will be on the road with the trailer after the end of the year, just not on a comedy bailout tour. For now, this trailer is my home. I also imagine I will continue to document my experiences, but I will end the commitment I made to regularly blog about it. I saw some things along the way I want to check out more, some things I didn't get to see that I want to see, and we love this rig and the freedom it affords, so there will be more adventures for us. Hopefully warmer!

Going to the Dentist in Mexico

2009-12-11T00:37:00.000-07:00

It's dentist time! We convoy from Pahrump to Yuma, AZ with Vince, Cheryl and Miranda. They have been to the dentist in Mexico five times, so we take advantage and of their experience and follow them down to Algodones, Mexico.

I have been in several countries, none of which did I think going to the dentist would be a good idea. Mexico never came to the top of the list when I thought about getting some dental work done, but here I was getting a root canal in Spanish at TLC dental.

Dentistry in Mexico is much, much less expensive than in America. Medical tourism is alive and well. I saw lots of older folks who looked like they just came out of a Sunday buffet waddling back and forth across the border, holding bags of ice to their faces. I saw no soldiers, no machine guns, just Good Sam Club members and dentists.

I picked up a root canal, crown, fillings and some other work. Took a couple of days what would have taken weeks in America. All the transactions took place in English, paid with American dollars. The dentist and his staff spoke Spanish to each other, and English to me when I talked to them. They didn't waste any time and worked fast. They were friendly and clean.

Ironic. Our new friend Miranda needed fillings because she was going into the Navy. A United States citizen getting medical care in Mexico to be fit for service in the American military. It's a brave new world.

My experience and results were good. I had some misconceptions about Mexico and the dentist, necessity required I drop them. It was a wild experience and the food was delicious!

See all the photos in the album here.

Minus Two

2009-12-10T12:55:00.000-07:00

A mind-numbing frozen halt, that is what -2 degrees delivers to trailer dwellers. We are in an RV park and the we are not the only ones locked up in ice. I have to use a hair dryer to unfreeze the locks and by the time I turn the lock it turns it freezes again. We are plenty warm inside, but the outside is a rock, and outside is inches away.

I spend my day with a heat gun pointed at pipes. Once I got everything unthawed my neighbor told me to leave the water running so it wouldn't freeze. Water didn't freeze, but the drain did. Need to get back out there today and point the heat gun at pipes.

A fitting last chapter to this adventure. Winter, the final season. The cold crushing fist of ice. We are camping in it every day!

FREEZING

2009-12-08T10:41:00.000-07:00

My blog has always been a few days behind what is actually happening. Now it is weeks behind and what is actually happening is we are camped in the snow in Utah and it is c-o-l-d. The trailer is holding up well, but a string of temperatures with lows in the single digits has not been fun. But this is where work and life takes me right now.

I am wrapping up this story and blog at the end of this month. It's been quite a year, more than I imagined and less than I imagined at the same time. I saw more of myself than I did of the scenery. Maybe it was the gusty winds that rocked my trailer parked on a dusty mesa in Nevada that stripped away the layers. Maybe it was listening the the scratchy Navaho AM radio station playing Indian drum music when we were in the middle of the great western America nowhere. Maybe it was the starlight I camped under for so many nights.

Now I am camped in the snow in Utah for the holiday show season, ice on the windows, heat tape on the water lines. Not too many more weeks and I slip off again, only this time...

Pahrump, Nevada

2009-12-03T11:06:00.002-07:00

"We are all meeting down at Sonic, you can come along if you like." If people take the time to invite me to something, I seriously consider taking them up. When we arrived in Pahrump we re-connected with our triker friends Vince and Cherl, so off we went to Sonic for the weekly triker meet-up. You can see all the photos here.

Things are not what they seem; that would be one of the real lessons from the road for me. You see trikes going down the road what do you think? I guess I never really thought about it much but I guess I thought they were, you know, bikers. Let's fight, let's swear, let's get a tattoo! While all those things are available to you as a triker, alas, once again I find people are people. What makes them good is not their hobbies but their hearts. Grandpa and grandma ride trikes too.

On the road I have found people who don't have much to be the most generous. Simple people, working people, people who have jobs. They open their lives up to you, they accept you and they share openly, take you into their homes and their lives.

Vince and Cheryl invited us over to see how they build the trikes. Then they invited us to meet up with their friends at Sonic that evening. They told us they would take us for a ride but they were going to Mexico in the morning. Why were they going to Mexico? Going to the dentist. Hey, I need to go to the dentist.

Wanna go to Mexico?

The Short Branch Saloon, Crystal, Nevada

2009-11-30T11:08:00.000-07:00

"I hear you are on a road trip of America. Bring your cameras and come on over to my place, I've got a story to tell you." I turned to find Kathy, with a big smile on her face, inviting me to visit her establishment in Crystal, Nevada. It was another of the welcome surprises that happened at Beatty Days.

As we left Beatty, Nevada and headed for Pahrump, we decided to take Kathy up on her offer and visit her in Crystal, Nevada at the Short Branch Saloon. So we took the lonesome road that turned off the lonesome highway and stopped in. We parked in the dirt lot, next to the missile, next door to the Cherry Patch Ranch House of Prostitution and Museum.

Kathy remembered us and was glad to see us. We got there in the afternoon, so things were slow. We sat down for a sarsaparilla and a story. She told us that she was the proprietor here, had been for years in a town of about 100 people. She ran the joint and took care of what needed taking care of, she had her ways.

Known for her meatloaf and steaks cooked to order, this watering hole was a destination ride from Vegas. Kathy claimed the likes of Toby Keith, Nicole Kidman and "tiny little" Keith Urban had spent and evening kicking their boots up here. HBO had filmed for "Heidi Fleiss: The Would-Be Madam of Crystal," out here. This is the wild, wild west were prostitution is legal and you have to be tough to survive. Not too many single women out here with the miners.

Kathy was taking no prisoners. "When I bought this place the man I bought it from told me I would be closed in 6 months. I'm still here and that 'Open' sign never gets turned off in case he drives by. I want him to see I never closed."

There are rooms in the back where a rider who has had a few too many can sleep it off. Patio and fire pit for slow conversations against a desert sunset.

This place is a desert gem, to be sure. But the real attraction has to be the strong spirit of Kathy, living her dream against the odds in the middle of nowhere. Surrounded by alien space ships, Predator drones, proposed nuclear waste dumps, miners, prostitution and lots of space, there is life. There is an oasis. Kathy and the Short Branch Saloon.

Rhyolite, Nevada

2009-11-28T11:16:00.001-07:00

How-dee Adventurers! From Beatty we took a short drive to ghost town of Rhyolite, Nevada. The first time I visited Rhyolite was driving with my friend Brian on the way back from Ridgecrest, California on our way to Las Vegas. On that trip, we drove through Death Valley National Monument and arrived at the Goldwell Open Air Museum at dusk.

It was a weird, and most striking experience. On their website they describe it best:

"Just outside of Rhyolite, Nevada, a spectacular ghost town off the road leading to Death Valley, California, a group of prominent Belgian artists, led by the late Albert Szukalski, created a self-described art situation consisting of seven outdoor sculptures that are colossal not only in their scale, but in their placement within the vast upper Mojave desert."

What that means it when you see "The Last Supper," by Belgian artist Albert Szukalski, which is a ghostly interpretation of Christ and his disciples, lighted and glowing against the backdrop of the expansive Amargosa Valley on a cold winter night, you ain't going to forget it. (using their words and mine).

There are other art pieces on the grounds, like the couch, and a gift shop museum staffed by friendly local volunteers. It is a very interesting visit, especially at dusk.

Just up the road from the Goldwell Museum is the ghost town of Rhyolite. This was my first visit to the ghost town. Long story short, this area suddenly grew to around 10,000 people when a new mine was opened and suddenly grew to around 0 when they figured out it was worthless a few years later. The town was built specifically for the mine from the ground up out of concrete so it would last. And last it has, out in the middle of nowhere.

One of the oddities close by is Tom Kelley's Bottle House. It is a house built of bottles. There is too much to describe here, check the link if you want the story. I can tell you this much, if you like to see what dreamers create, Rhyolite has lots to offer.

The story of Rhyolite also is a warning to us of potential blindness when chasing wealth. Wanting something to be true doesn't make it so, best to deal with what is. But not dealing with what is does make for an awesome ghost town.

The Sourdough Saloon

2009-11-23T10:13:00.001-07:00

Hello Adventurers! If you are looking for a unique, wild-west experience, look no further than the Sourdough. In the style of many old taverns, it has a wood interior covered with personalized dollar bills and anything else you care to staple to the wall with the stapler they provide. Bikes parked in front.

We stopped in the night after Beatty Days, so things had settled back down. If you want to have a drink with a real wild-west cowboy, not someone who dresses up like a wild-west cowboy for special occasions, he is here. These guys aren't pretending. This ain't Disneyland.

We had a pizza and talked to Benny, the owner. Watched a guy get given the ultimatum from the lady bar tender that, "you will not bring out the Raven, you can sit in this corner or that or leave." after a guy repeated tried to talk to the lady sitting next to me who was married to the gunfighter. Apparently "The Raven" is her alter-ego that deals with things that get out of hand. The guy paid his bill and left. We did not see the Raven.

The men's restroom (the only one I saw) is another wonder. It is covered with inscriptions from visitors past and an admonition from the management to not drop cigarette butts in the toilet.

At the crossroads of nowhere is a saloon called the Sourdough. If you've been there you know.

Check out these reviews of the place, they explain it well.

Beatty Days, 2009

2009-11-20T19:55:00.002-07:00

A couple of years ago we stumbled into Beatty, Nevada on our way to Death Valley, California and almost couldn't get a room because it was "Beatty Days." We decided to stay and check it out. This year we returned to one of our favorite small town festivals full of bikers, miners, gun-fighters, military and anyone else that wanders off the interstate in the desert of Nevada.

We missed the "Chunken-Dales," big guy pageant, but made the parade. My trusted companion took these pictures, I was shooting video. This is Cotton (above), he carried a bright American flag in the parade in his Navy uniform.

Trikes in the parade turn the corner in front of the Sourdough. These are the people that gave us rides and became our friends. We shared the Bailey's Hot Springs RV Park with them. (More about the Sourdough and our triker friends in coming subsequent posts.)

The parade was on Halloween. The sun was out, it was a beautiful day. The high school marching band, antique cars, bikes, local businesses and patriots filled out the line-up. After the parade everyone headed over the the park for a day filled with bed races, car show, bands, food, and biker games.

After talking to some locals, I found that recently the mine had shut down and Beatty had gone from about 2,000 residents to about 1,000 within the last couple of years. The local grocery closed down, not enough business.

I imagine these small-town events and festivals are pretty important to bring additional dollars into the community. With 1,000 residents, even a few dollars could have a big impact. For me, events like this give me a chance to slow down and not get charged $5 for a soft drink while I am being entertained. That makes a big economic impact for me.

I would love to visit as many of these events as I can in the future, full of things I've never seen before. Many of the most interesting and interesting things I have seen people do haven't had huge crowds involved.

Beatty Days, yes!

60 Square Feet of Wisdom

2009-11-20T09:36:00.003-07:00

60 Square Feet of Wisdom, Carol Venolia's eco-friendly trailer exemplifies living on less . I am linking to this excellent article that appears on the Natural Home Magazine website, and describes with beautiful professional writing, living in the exact trailer that I use. I can't write like Carol, she really nails the experience in a user-friendly description. Caught the link over on the FiberglassRV website, reposting here. Kudos Carol.

We have been boondocking for the past week, living for free in the desert with a bunch of other people. I think this is about the last of the sun for the rest of the year for us. On the move again soon. Still pulling together the pictures and story from Beatty Days and our trip to Mexico!

Bailey's Hot Springs

2009-11-13T13:59:00.001-07:00

Head down Highway 95 five miles north of Beatty and you will find Bailey's Hot Springs. There's a small RV campground where your fee includes use of the springs (around $20), or you can pay $5 and hop in to one of the three different temperature springs for 30 minutes or so. We got in twice a day while we stayed!

The manager of the park is a guy named Six-Toe. He's pretty great, has a subtle sense of humor. One of those quiet guys who sees and knows a lot more about people than his quiet style might imply. If you go, make sure you spend a few minutes talking with him.

There are three different temperature springs, determined by the size of the room and the amount of outside air that cools the water. The keys are on the bench out the RV office under a rock. We always used bath #1, which was supposed to be between 103-108 degrees I think. It was about that.

The water is really clear. You can see the gravel bottom of the springs easily. Each spring has a small changing room attached to it.

My friend Brian in Vegas told me about the springs and Six-Toe. I don't know how long this place has been here or will be here because it is up for sale.

It's beautiful out here.

Hope you have a great weekend.

On To Beatty Days

2009-11-12T10:28:00.000-07:00

So on we drove into Nevada and on to Beatty Days. Beatty is a small mining town that time seems to have passed by. We drove past Creech Air force base and saw my first Predator in the sky. Headed for Bailey Hot Springs campground.

Many sights to see along the way.

Fly-in service.

Clipped a wing and stayed.

The Dudley's Full-Time RV Story

2009-11-10T08:55:00.002-07:00

Check this story out:

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/33616972/ns/today-today_people/

These guys are friends of my sister and we both started full-timing about the same time. I e-mailed back and forth with them a bit in the beginning, but obviously we went different directions when it came to RV hardware. Congratulations to the Dudleys and their national exposure on the Today Show. Happy Trails!

Pictures From Zion Canyon, Fall

2009-11-10T00:40:00.001-07:00

Returning to the story line... Next stop after Moab was Zion Canyon, previously I had only driven through it, this time I got out and looked around. Let's face it, some places do kind of smack you upside the head with their beauty. Zion Canyon is one of those places.

Fall was a beautiful time to visit, but I imagine any time is a beautiful time to visit. The trees were beginning to turn, their leaves a vibrant lemon-lime. I wore a neutral grey sweatshirt so as not to compete with nature's show.

We rode the shuttle bus and got off at a few stops, one was Weeping Rock. After a short hike this was the view back down the canyon (above).

The way the light was hitting the mountains it showcased the stunningly different colors of rock.

At Weeping Rock the water constantly trickles off the edge of an arch, shimmering droplets to the ground.

In the afternoon, the sun streamed in to backlight the water against the sky.

Above, view from the main campground where we sat and ate our picnic lunch. I am no landscape photographer, these are pretty much snapshots. Sometimes it doesn't take much to take great shots when it is perfection everywhere you look.

It Finally Happened

2009-11-09T09:23:00.005-07:00

It's been one long, rolling, three-week drive that has organically evolved into a magical, mythical journey into the unknown and unexplored. Starting in Monday the 19th in Boulder, Colorado we drove to Moab, Zion Canyon, Las Vegas, Beatty, Rhyolite, Crystal, Pahrump, Yuma, Algodones Mexico, Quartzite, Ari, Bullhead City and now heading back to Las Vegas. An adventure full of tales worthy of any audience.

Basically it goes like this: We left our summer camp in Colorado and headed to Moab where we met up with Craig and his dune buggy. We took lots o' pictures then headed to St. George, Utah and then Zion Canyon where we took lots more pictures. Then we headed to Nevada, stopped in Overton and met some great people in the RV park there. We then went to Vegas and then Beatty, Nevada for Beatty Days.

We camped at Bailey Hot Springs where we met Six-Toe and enjoyed the mineral springs every day. In the small RV campground was a bunch of trike riders who befriended us, took us for rides and hung out with us. We met Benny at the Sourdough. Then we went to Pahrump, visited the trikers who told us they were going to Mexico in the morning to go to the dentist. We went along.

We went to the dentist in Algones and I got a root canal among other things. A root canal in Mexico! It took a couple of days to do the work, so we hung out in Yuma, AZ with our new friends. (On the phone to her friends, their daughter said they were hanging out with "some wandering people.") From there we drove to Ari, Arizona and stayed at the KOA before we all headed to Oatman, Arizona and saw the donkey's wandering the streets.

This trip is what I thought could happen, but it took ten months to get here. That was a wild ride, now I need to bolt things back down and find out what I broke or lost, and do the details that keep some structure going.

Watching is not the same as being there and doing it.

Turning The Equation Upside Down

2009-11-06T09:12:00.000-07:00

We left Nevada and drove on to Arizona and California. We joined new friends and made a convoy to Mexico. That's right, we are now visiting a border town in Mexico. There is a reason we are here (legal) and I will reveal the story shortly. Right now things are still moving so fast I don't have time to distill it and serve it to you.

I know there is tension in some border towns but not where we are visiting. A couple of years ago we visited Matamoros and there were hummers and soldiers and machine guns in plain sight, but not here, everything seems mello. Had an awesome dinner in an open air restaurant will beautiful music and the sun setting. And no pain.

We are wrapping up here and heading back to Nevada, we still have a couple of more days of adventure planned and then I will bring the story up to date. This is part of what I had in mind when I started this last year. I planned to move and see and do. It seems like I waited a long time to move and now that we are, the adventure abounds.

Things Are Moving Fast

2009-11-04T07:49:00.000-07:00

Spending all my time driving, photographing, setting up, taking down. We left Zion Canyon and headed for Nevada. Couple of days at Lake Mead then Las Vegas and then over to Beatty Days in Beatty, NV. That's when things started getting really interesting. Really interesting.

Let's just say it all started when we met and American Indian named Six-Toe and it goes from there. Located somewhere between Area 51, the proposed national high-level nuclear waste dump at Yucca Mountain, Death Valley, and the Air Force predator drone base. Throw in a triker gang, some rottweilers, a bordello town and a Biscuit and you have the makings of quite a story.

We are on the move again today and will be for the next few days. We are about to kick our story up a notch or two. This is about to get really interesting. I wanted an adventure, I think I found one.

I still have to finish my story from Zion Canyon and post the awesome shots I got there. Getting caught between the living and the telling, spending too much time doing to talk about it. YES!

Still Alive

2009-11-02T18:59:00.000-07:00

Been off the beaten path for the last few days and haven't had TV, internet or phone service. I'll fill you in on the details soon, but for now just letting you know we are fine. After visiting Zion Canyon we slipped into southern Nevada and into some very sparely populated areas. I'll have pictures and video up soon, we are still driving and moving every day.

To adventure!

Travel Day, Moab to St. George, Utah

2009-10-27T15:29:00.001-06:00

This day saw us leave Moab, Utah and drive to St. George, Utah via I-70. Gorgeous weather and a beautiful fall day to enjoy rolling down the highway. We are headed for an adventure in Zion National Park. I have lived in Utah many years and never seen some of the most beautiful places in the world that are in my own back yard. Sound familiar?

Things I will remember from Moab...

Note to self: After it rains the campground will look different. While it may make beautiful impromptu waterfalls, it also makes mud and giant puddles in the lowest spots. If you look around, you may find you are camped in a potential mud puddle that is no longer a potential puddle. If you are in a slot canyon when this rain happens, you may find yourself suddenly drowned.

The rain splashed mud all over my boots stashed under the trailer in an artistic and folksy way. I might win a ribbon at the County Fair photography contest, but it was still mud.

I will remember dune buggy rides to fantastic overlooks. If I had to hike or mountain bike I would never be able to see these sights. Thank goodness for horsepower and a few back roads.

Campground dinners! Things just taste better with dirt.

Stunning scenery... fire and rain...

Complete with an EPA Superfund clean-up site that had a truck tip over and spill and shut the site down when we were there. Don't think that just because a place is beautiful that it is safe for you, or from you. Right on the Colorado River. Fire and rain.

But most importantly...

Time spent with trusted friends who can be around me and put up with me and still be my friend (that goes double for my trusted companion). Thanks. Seriously. Thank you for an awesome time.

But wait! Zion Canyon awaits!

Second Day of Moab Adventure

2009-10-25T22:38:00.004-06:00

My friend Craig has an awesome mind, so to keep himself busy he built a car. Seriously, a car. From the ground up. I know he did it because I watched him do it. Today was the day he took his creation out on the road to see what it could do. Turns out it can do a lot.

Craig is also a landscape photographer so he got me psyched to get up at dawn to shoot photographs. (you may remember my blog post about our trip the San Rafael Swell last March.)

I got up, but he got up earlier and ditched me and went shooting by himself. Typical artist! (I can't say I blame him, he's pretty serious about landscape photography.) So I went on a hike and took pictures anyway. Because you are not going to see too many sunrise shots from me, here you go.

I found these cool dinosaur tracks too.

Craig came back and we bundled up and headed out to the back roads in the buggy. We were checking everything as we went, making sure the car actually worked.

It did more than work, it roared. We climbed up and over a mountain pass that has been washed out by the previous day's rain, jumping over strewn boulders like they were Nerf rocks.

It was nerve-racking for about 20 seconds, the rest of the ride was peaceful.

We headed over to Dead Horse Point to check out the view. Spectacular. We ate lunch while we sat at the viewpoint and made friends with a photographer from the Dominican Republic on a 14 day photo tour of the Western US. (If you stumble onto this, howdy!)

After a big day photographing and riding we finished off at the Red Cliffs Lodge and Movie Museum. Craig checked out the location for the next day's photo shoot and snapped a few more frames. It was so incredibly beautiful that I pointed my camera at it and snapped a few too.

We wound up the day having dinner and watching the sun set over this view. Wow. Then we headed over to the movie museum where you can see stills and memorabilia from the movies made in Moab. And you can have your picture taken with John Wayne. How much more Old West can you get?

Lots of great public land for you to enjoy in Moab. I want to thank Craig for taking us out and showing us around. I have never spent time in Moab before (other than when we drove through to pick up the trailer). I was ignorant of what is going on down here. It really is something special.

Camping in Moab

2009-10-22T16:41:00.004-06:00

After an amazing summer in Colorado we are moving again. Leaving always takes longer than planned. We started getting ready at 8 AM, by sunset we were on the road headed up the Western Slope. The sun set as we reached Vail, we drove on through the darkness.

We arrived in Grand Junction, CO later than expected and I didn’t know of any campsites there, so we just kept going. Typically I don’t like to drive past sunset, mainly because it is so hard to find and set up a campsite in the dark. Arrived in Moab, UT around midnight, drove up a canyon, found a campsite and parked. I can level and set up the trailer in just a few minutes now, even in the dark. I took a shower and went to bed.

Driving through the night, then stopping and camping in the dark, and then waking in the morning to see where you are can be a mind-blowing experience. Somehow we picked a stunning campsite next to the Colorado River. It’s a BLM site and $8 a night. And the bonus?

World’s most scenic outhouse.. Why have a roof when the view is this good?

Our friend arrived just as the rain really kicked in. We had two campsites rented for the night and his completely flooded. The roads turned into a streams, and camp pads into lily pads. Eventually the rain stopped and we were able to make dinner, watch “The Big Lebowski” then hit the sack.

Moab Dude

2009-10-20T13:17:00.000-06:00

We drove over the mountains (10,600 ft at Vail) and out the canyons and now we are in Moab. Our internet is spotty, we are camped outside of town at a BLM campground. Our friend is headed this way with his dunebuggy. Have already taken some beautiful pictures, will get some posted shortly.

I was thinking last night that I am always home, wherever I park my trailer. It is nice to go to bed in the same bed in a hundred changing locations. But then I thought, the truth is I am always home even without my trailer. I am always tucked away in my little corner of the universe.

More soon, on an adventure.

Nightmare Ford Goes Home

2009-10-17T22:51:00.003-06:00

We just loaded up the mortally wounded Ford F150 to be hauled back to Utah. Every time I see a Ford truck commercial I want to puke. Of all the potential perils I could foresee for my tour, blowing a "Built Ford Tough" motor at 79,000 miles was not one I expected. The poor design of the head of this motor, and the burden it places on buyers of this product, is obscene.

I sense a major component of my story when I go to tell it in a few short months will be my experience with this truck.

Thanks to the crew who came out to Colorado to pick the truck up and haul it back. Your efforts are much appreciated.

Thanks to a tour supporter we found a new rig, the motor condo of our home. Here's a snappy picture. We've slid back 10 years to a 1994 and we've changed manufacturers to Chevrolet. With the truck finally headed back home we hope we can get back to heading down the road.

So in a few short days we leave our impromptu some home of Colorado and follow the sun. We've got a few stops planned if our luck holds out, and hope to be on the road again for the next few weeks. I smell the open road!!!

Came Home to Snow

2009-10-14T12:06:00.005-06:00

Came home from beautiful Virginia to SNOW! The dingdang trailer was covered. Dusted the snow off, climbed in and crashed. Airport days are long, especially when waking up at 2:00 AM (body clock) after working 20 hour days. I am not a machine, it kicks my butt.

Hey, I got a mention on tinyhouseblog.com. I got a lot of hits the past couple of days and wondered what was wrong! I looked up my site and a bunch of people where coming from tinyhouses from the link that mentions me, so thanks.

I have learned a lot about what I need to be happy, and the answer is not a whole lot. I found I use a lot less water and power resources to live than when I was a slab dweller. I find I don't need things -- where would I put them? I am happy if I am comfortable, full and warm. After that it seems like degrees. I can be comfortable or extremely comfortable, but happy kicks in at comfortable.

We have enough for everyone, but not the way we are living it today. My humble suggestion is that we all slow waaaaaaay down. But the government wants 50% of what I earn, the Marriott wants $320 a night plus $30 a night for parking and $6 for bottled water, the Broncos want $200 a ticket and $8.00 a beer, Comcast wants $100 a month, the pizza joint wants $30 for dinner, jeans cost $150 and a tune-up on my four year old Ford F150 was $1500 right before the motor blew.

I bought health insurance to protect me during illness. Now illness causes me to lose my health insurance. Sort of isn't insurance then, is it? Now it seems I need the government to insure me from my insurance company, and for some reason the insurance companies don't want that. While they enjoy collecting my money now, they would still like to be able to drop me if paying my bills ever becomes tiresome.

Norfolk, VA

2009-10-13T18:18:00.005-06:00

I climbed on an airplane (again) and flew across America to work with the AAPC, great people, love working with them! Spent the better part of last week in Norfolk, VA staying at the Sheraton Waterside. Had hot and cold running water, electricity, cable TV and a king bed. Missed my trailer.

In Norfolk there are mermaids everywhere. Let me emphasize everywhere. I guess it is their symbol, seeing as how they are crusty old salts of the sea. As symbols go, not a bad one at all. Mythical, whimsical, and all in a bathing suit.

Lots of ships and boats. Here I am standing in front of a ship, a battleship, the Wisconsin. Frickin' tourist. My dad used to spend time out here (he worked for the Navy). I told him they had an aircraft carrier in port and he said, "What number?" What an odd question I thought, but I remembered seeing a big 7 on it. He was like, "Oh, must be a helicopter carrier." Turns out he was right, here is the ship I saw, the USS Iwo Jima.

Here's a picture of our car-window-service food at Doumar's. The green drinks are limeades, I approve.

Lots of history out here. Soon my trailer adventure will be history too. Just a couple of months left before I shut it down. I am thankful for the 12 fans I managed to reach during the past 10 months, but it's a new world. I have had far more hits on the video I posted of my broken spark plugs (no editing) than any of the videos I labored hours and hours over.

No Exit Strategy

2009-10-08T15:09:00.001-06:00

I just had an ice cream cone at the home of the world's first ice cream cone machine, Doumars, in Norfolk, VA. It's great to see old places that survive intact. Not too many long-term businesses on the landscape, not too many original ideas. It's a franchise world, with franchise thought and franchise emotion.

No need to take care of anything, it will be replaced. Use it up, throw it away. The colors aren't right, throw it away. The corporate office will send you a diagram of how to decorate to maximize dollars today, forget about tradition -- unless you can monetize it. Building doesn't suit your purpose after 10 years? Bulldoze it.

It's a shame really that our businesses are anonymous, with interchangeable workers, owners and ideas. Doesn't matter what you do, someone can replace you. Doesn't matter how long you've been there, you can be replaced. The mission statement is "Return Value to the Investor," not make your community a better place to live.

The value of the enterprise itself and the benefits it brings to the people and the community have been lost location by location, just like your corner diner. What is the value of existing, of having the opportunity to experience something your parents experienced? What's that worth? Don't you sometimes want to step outside a company manual with company profit-driven attitude and visit a world created by a dream or an idea? To visit the birthplace of an idea?

Try Doumars in Norfolk if you get a chance. Clean, delicious and no exit strategy.

Episode 8 -- Father Son Run

2009-10-05T09:05:00.000-06:00

Its Harleys and biker tales in this episode of the Johnny B Comedy Bailout as Johnny posts and ad on Craigslist offering camera services and is hired to shoot footage for the Father Son Run. Erik and Wally Beck ride across America on Harleys. Interviews with the Becks on life, internet and motorcycles, and biker tales from Jimmy "The Gimp." Erik is the host of "Backyard FX" on indymogul.com.

fathersonrun.com

Erik Beck

indymogul.com

nextnewnetworks.com

A Chance Meeting With Ron

2009-09-30T11:35:00.002-06:00

Traveling through airports you bump into people. Last week, as I sat waiting for yet another plane, I heard a fast-paced conversation with confident voices coming from the corner. When I looked I saw the face of Ron Yengich, champion of the underdog. He fights the system from inside the system. You have the scruff to do that? I didn't think so.

Ron is Utah's best known criminal defense attorney. Why is he the best known? Because he stands up for people for whom no one will stand. LOVE IT. He even defended Mark Hofmann who scammed the LDS Church and others, then blew up a couple people (and himself) trying to hide it. Try getting a pat on the back for that one in Utah. Saying that you believe in the Constitution and defending it by providing an able defense for the accused are two different things.

Ron was personable and friendly, like a guy you would meet on the weekend at a baseball game rather than a guy who wields tremendous power and who argues for a living. He was happy and funny, I could tell he was over-flowing with a powerful personality. Now there's a guy I would love to interview.

We talked for a few minutes, he seemed completely aware of who I was from my comedy career. I told him of my admiration for people who stand up to the man. Popular opinion does not make right in my mind, even in a Google Adsense world of hit counter metrics.

It is easy to say nothing when the bad ideas blow by, especially if you are in the minority. If you do speak up, trust me, people don't even listen to what is being said, they just emotionally turn their anger on the minority for having the impertinence to bring up the subject from the "wrong" point of view. You violated rule #1; most people aren't interested in the truth, they are interested in the truth that supports their truth, and so if you ain't following the #1 rule (speech that supports the majority truth), it doesn't matter what you are saying, you just get punished.

Ron doesn't care; what is right is too important to let slide just to keep the majority happy. I believe America was founded on the idea of equality, on the innate value of each person, regardless of their position or power in life. Freedom. The freedom to choose, even when the choice isn't the majority, and not just freedom to choose, the freedom from persecution for your ideas. Years ago my family was persecuted for its ideas, seems like some of us forgot what that felt like.

Our country has been looted by pirates who have carved up everything of value and are selling off for their personal gain. See Ken Burns' 'National Parks' to get an idea of what I am talking about. Anytime there is something valuable, someone wants to own it and sell it back to people. Unfortunately, we have done the same with our legal system. We took one of the most brilliant ideas in history (the Constitution) and turned it into a vehicle for personal injury attorneys and eminent domain shopping malls.

Equal justice under the law only comes from guys like Ron, and there just aren't enough of them or enough respect for them. Thank God America has a Constitution, and thank God that we at least have a chance of telling the truth before the money machine crushes its opposition. Criminal defense attorneys prove our belief in justice and the Constitution far more than prosecutors.

Fall Teases Me

2009-09-29T19:08:00.004-06:00

Fall teases me with weather that acts like summer, then turns to winter with little notice. Sunday the sun shone brightly, so we loaded our bikes into our car and headed out for a ride. No place special, just a place we hadn't been. No expectations, just a ride.

We headed toward the Colorado University campus area called "The Hill." We started near Peal Street and headed up the hill. I guess I figured out how they named it, huh? We sauntered along, not much motivation or direction in our pedaling.

We stopped at Whole Foods. I have been looking for Manhattan clam chowder for years and they had it! Piping hot and ready to eat. So we bought a cup and sat outside with the breast-feeding mothers and Ben and Jerry ice cream eating hippies and enjoyed our lunch.

We mounted up and headed out and not more than 5 minutes later we crossed a bridge and something caught my eye. Lots of somethings. Down in the river was a guy stacking rocks into intricate piles of balance and defiance of gravity. It was amazing. I have no idea how he got round rocks to stand in a pile. He was very careful, I'll tell you that.

I quickly shot these pictures and a little bit of video. The thing that gets me, is how things that I don't know about find me, or I find them, when I leave the couch. It takes no planning for me to have a great experience, I just have to getting moving.

When we got to "The Hill," they were having a flea market and dancing in the streets. We bought some vegetables, had a beverage at an outdoor cafe, watched the dancers and after a while headed home. A perfectly wonderful day, zero planning, just a little getting off my butt to make the magic happen.

I shot a short piece of video with my Aiptek of the people dancing. Here ya go. Notice the ages of the people, they are all ages. Freedom rules.

Family Shoot-out at America's Nerve Gas Center

2009-09-25T14:05:00.003-06:00

If you were going to shoot 5,000 rounds of airsoft ammo at your family, where would be the ideal location? Might I suggest Utah's Great Basin, just outside of the Army's Dugway Proving Grounds. This scenic location is where America incinerates its left-overs of nerve gas, in case you wondered in whose backyard they do that. It is also a prime airsoft proving ground.

So many choices...

What a great day for a family activity! I had never before seen these advanced airsoft guns or known about the secret society of enthusiasts. These suckers can pump out a brazillian little plastic pebbles in full-auto until the sun sets, and then you can switch to tracer mode and keep going! They are full-sized and very realistic, other than the orange tip on the barrel.

Team Biscuit

As a rookie fighter, I showed up in jeans and a T-shirt. Luckily I was teamed up with some experts, who helped me explore my inner guerilla warrior. The above pictured young lad put a shot right between the eyes of my brother at about 50 yards. Sweet. All the hits I took were to the arms and legs and didn't hurt, probably because the bullets where going the same direction as me, seeing as I was frequently running away from the people shooting at me.

Nerve gas on the horizon, this is the "useless" and "barren" land where America handles her weapons of mass destruction.

This airsoft stuff is over the top. Seriously. What happened to pointing your finger or a stick and making the machine-gun noise, followed by the "You're dead!"- "No-I'm-not, you missed!" arguments where young boys learned negotiation skills? Now you have little welts on your face; hard to argue with little red dots. Plus these guns are serious money. And heavy! I got tired carrying the serious hardware, running up and over hills, jumping behind trees and rocks, and retreating.

The really sick thing? It was fun. I really liked it. Something wrong with me.

Have a great weekend!

Apple Customer Care Rocks It Hard

2009-09-25T00:06:00.001-06:00

Check this out, the screen on my MacBook Pro died a while ago and I have been saving up to have my computer repaired. So I finally take it in, and it turns out there is a recall on the NVIDIA chips and NVIDIA was covering the replacement. So my local Apple Genius boxes it up and sends it off. The computer was returned to me today, not only did they fix the screen, they also found and fixed a broken screen latch, stuck keys on the keyboard and replaced the battery and shipped it out and back, N/C.

I cannot believe the contrast in the way I have been treated on with the other products that have broken on this trip, as compared to the colossal nightmare owning and servicing a Ford F150 has been. The Ford F150 truck affair has been a mind-numbing horror that has blown a hole through the heart of my efforts this year. It literally stopped me in my tracks. Every time I see that Mike Rowe commercial where he says, "Why Ford, why now?" with a smug reality-show-host-esque look I think, "Call me Mike, I'll tell you why not Ford." For starters, you'll pay $1500 for a tune-up then $8500 for a new motor. "Customer Pay," is what the lady at Ford told me.

Now, maybe I was supposed to stop here and if it took blowing my truck up, then fate did what it had to do. Colorado has opened my eyes for sure. But so did Hawaii, Texas, re-visiting Utah, and every other spot along the way. I did wish there was more driving and exploring. (I've got tons of photos and videos coming in the DVD)

THANK YOU SO MUCH APPLE! Your excellent customer care has made my life and the lives of my 12 fans that much better by standing by your product. Cheers.

Guess What I Found

2009-09-23T22:04:00.002-06:00

Blogging, social media, travel, video, people... I have had lots of hands on experience with these things this year. Confessions? Just not nearly as impressed with myself as when I started. Back in the trailer in Colorado after two weeks living out of a suitcase. Flu plus exhaustion has slowed my work to a crawl, I have scarcely posted. Today I stayed in my comfy Casita and rested.

I no longer believe simply recounting of the details of my daily activities in my blog to be a meaningful story. My "tour" is no tour at all, but it has been an adventure and an adventure is a wonderful thing! My work has to include introspection and contemplation, or I feel like what I produce is just busy work.

The story is not about me. I thought the "big idea" was to go out and report what I found; I thought the story would be me experiencing things. What I discovered is the details of what happens to me don't really matter. What actually matters is the running narrative that is woven invisibly and inextricably through those details.

Somehow your story talks to you as you hear my story, that's what matters. The story is the story, not me. I can't see the important parts of the story to you, I can barely see the important parts to me (and only after time has passed and the context becomes more clear). All I can do is faithfully tell a story.

I am less impressed with people than ever, I take don't take food, freedom or life for granted. Water has captured my respect and fascination with it's endless uses and powers. The internet is a prostitute and a professor, changing shapes so quickly I cannot comprehend which it is at what moment. I follow and break the new rules of communication.

Life is raw, strong, wonderful and cruel. I thought I would find the unexplored world, what I am finding my self and your self.

Oh, BTW, it's a picnic condiment holder. God bless America.

Have You Seen My Shorts?

2009-09-17T15:32:00.000-06:00

Long days working the InContact user conference in Salt Lake City. Produced several nice video shorts for them over the past few days, also did a comedy show. My shorts well very well received.

During my comedy show (which was outdoors) a guy walked in and sat down in the front. He started yelling stuff at me, most of which seemed to pivot around the "F" word and various applications of it to me and my act. Can't say that I blame him on some of it, but mostly he was yelling at whatever noise he heard, not so much at his disappointment over my show. Looked like he was having a tough go in life.

The security came and tried to get him to leave (no), started trying to drag him out (no) and finally left him there for the rest of my show. At one point he came up to the stage and Obama bumped fists and handed me a wadded up bill (which later turned out to be a $20 which got returned to him.) Apparently the audience could not hear what he was yelling at me.

Been a long time since I have had the rock-n-roll full-metal-jacket comedy experience. Like I say, if you are going to play baseball you are going to get hit with a few pitches. Live comedy can come at your head fast sometimes. Gotta shake it off and get back to the plate.

Distance Changes My Perspective

2009-09-14T23:48:00.002-06:00

You ever fly over your town or your house? Things look different to me from a distance, gives me another perspective. Hawaii gave me a wonderful experience. It gave me more encouragement to slow down and aim for what matters to me. It reminded me again the pirates are not always the ones with tattoos. Hawaii reminded me to be better. Hawaii reminded me to love people.

I am back on the mainland in Salt Lake City working with an enthusiastic conference of IT people. Flew a United 767 over to Hawaii; awesome, smooth as butter, great experience with flight crew, ticketing, everything. Flew a new 777 back; same thing, butter. Awesome people experience. I love traveling in America. My United experience was great, everything as promised. My Alamo experience likewise. Marriott was awesome, and so was Zippy's.

I am once again in a beautiful hotel and working with enthusiastic, talented, people. Had lunch at my friend's restaurant downtown, Su Casa. Good to be back on the big pile of dirt.

Thanks Hawaii. It was a very nice visit.

A Story I Heard: A Surfer's Ocean Misadventure

2009-09-11T12:09:00.002-06:00

I am sitting on the beautiful North Shore of Oahu. As the sunset ends its work for the day, the surfers begin to crawl out of the sea and back to land. One surfer, as he shakes the water out of his ears, starts to chat.

He remembers seeing us at the bakery a few miles away, remembers my trusted companion's hat. He looks exactly how a surfer should look and he speaks exactly how a surfer should speak. He's easy to talk to and has a nice smile.

"Yesterday I was right out there and I see this big fin moving through the water," he starts. "No one even saw it so I swam over to tell them and all over a sudden a 200 pound Marlin jumps 6 feet in the air. No one has ever seen a Marlin swimming around here like that so I paddle over and grab it. I am hanging on to its tail and I know I have to do something or someone else will so I get a rock and kill it. Then I drag it back up to the beach and there are about 30 people taking pictures."

"I drag it over to my friend's and he cuts it up for me. When he is cleaning up after he slips on the fish slime and falls on the talon and breaks three ribs. I told him 'Dude, I wish I never would have caught the fish if I had known what would happen to you.' And he said, 'Dude, don't worry about it. Stuff happens.'"

"So the Hawaii Fishing Times maybe wants to do a story on me. Never heard of a guy catching a Marlin with a rock. It happened last night, right here, right about this time."

Still Busy

2009-09-10T13:07:00.000-06:00

I'm Busy

2009-09-09T12:52:00.002-06:00

The Open Road Lifestyle

2009-09-07T13:57:00.002-06:00

I met a one-legged biker named Jimmy the Gimp. He let me sit on his motorcycle. He let me tap on his wooden leg. He showed me how to properly show my attitude. This is why I love the open road lifestyle. Any questions?

Seriously, just another day on the road, meeting people doing their thing. How do I meet them? Go to where the people are, and they definitely are not in your living room. Got to dive in and get in the mix.

Jimmy was part of the crew on the Father-Son-Run, that's how I met him. Shot another day Saturday with Erik and Wally Beck. Awesome guys. Went to a biker bar and had a buffalo burger with them. I did get Erik to sit for the trailer tour camera and interviewed him, so look for that down the road. Sorry video episodes have slowed here, busy making shorts for work.

As I write this I am looking out over the Pacific Ocean. We hooked the trailer to a 767 and pulled it to Hawaii. The trailer tour has left the continental United States! Actually we left the trailer for a bit and flew to Hawaii, doing some work here with the AAPC, awesome, awesome people.

My next posts will be from Oahu. The ocean breeze is blowing through my room.

What Makes a Great Story?

2009-09-04T10:54:00.000-06:00

I like the people I find out on the road, people living their lives and doing their thing because it makes them happy. I find there are so many awesome people, so many awesome things going on every day. I like the stories of unique people; people's dreams and their struggles. And I like stories about people having fun! Regular people stories rock my socks.

Yesterday I met some interesting people, the Becks. Erik Beck is re-uniting with his Dad to ride from Fort Collins, CO where Pops lives, to Brooklyn, New York where Erik lives. Only problem, Erik has never ridden a street bike. He is making a documentary about the experience and hired me via Craigslist to shoot for a couple of days. Yesterday I shot Erik buying the motorcycle, it was awesome. Erik is one of those bright, young guys with a great attitude and a lot of talent. This looks like a great story.

Check out Erik at his job, indymogul.com and follow Erik and his Dad on their ride, fathersonrun.com.

I am excited by the possibilities of the internet to tell these stories. Everywhere I look more and more people are turning on cameras and publishing their stories and ideas. Personally, I would love to find a financially viable way to tell stories like these full-time. In the mean time I'll do it as I can with the resources I have, just like a regular artist.

8 Months

2009-08-31T22:39:00.002-06:00

It's been 8 months, I can see the end of the year from here, let me take a look back. The tour has been nothing like I expected or imagined when I conceived it. I started out to help other people, what happened is people have helped me.

I have seen how few resources it can take to make me happy. The more I've slowed down the more I've seen. I've thought about life, thought about how much I need to be forgiven. I've found new happiness in watching people, animals and nature, in seeing patterns. I've found fresh reasons to value family and friends.

I set out to do something that hasn't really happened. I haven't really got much of a trailer tour going, but in spite of my best intentions and multiple failures, I have had a series of wonderful experiences. As an artist I like to see people's minds stimulated by what I do, and I think some of that has happened. The fresh air has done me good, not as impressed with myself these days and I like that. I know my mind has been stimulated and expanded.

So here's to my mighty failure, and its rousing success! And the the literally dozens of people who read my blog from time to time, here's to you!

Habits Make You Happy

2009-08-27T08:45:00.003-06:00

Our habits make us happy because they are familiar. My mother was confined to her bed many years of her life because of rheumatoid arthritis, sometimes all she had were her habits. Ever go camping and then come back to your habits? Ever been traveling and been denied your habits? How much will you really pay for your Coke? I think the airport knows.

Maybe I am so drawn to the open road because I watched my mother live in such a tiny space. Even my tiny space seems large because it moves and I can see the world. Living in an RV allows me to have my habits and move, keeps me happy.

Saw Bat For Lashes and Other Lives the other night at the Bluebird in Denver, Colorado. Thanks to our friend for the tickets, (a birthday gift for my trusted companion.) There are so many cool venues here.

The Techmologies

2009-08-24T11:30:00.010-06:00

"Ladies and Gentlemen may I have your attention," the waitress yelled out to the crowded diner. "We have here some Village virgins!" Thunderous roars and claps followed as everyone turned to stare. I meekly waved back.

The Village Coffee Shop in Boulder is one of those old-time please-don't-ever-close diners that didn't ever institute corporate flair, the customers bring their own. The food? Like your momma used to make if your momma ran a logging camp. It is delicious, and it is serious eating.

On the wall I saw this sign:

That's right, even the old school dinner is using the techmologies, there is no way around it, wake up and smell the coffee! Dude, seriously. Technology has become one of the key threads to this adventure of mine.

"Ladies and Gentlemen may I have your attention," the waitress a few tables down suddenly roared. "We have here some Village virgins!" I smiled a happy smile as I clapped and hooted.

I updated the blog with more new techmologies. Hope you like it as much as I liked the Village Coffee Shop. Oh, here's their Facebook link.

Sam's Club Gave Me Great Customer Service

2009-08-21T12:25:00.002-06:00

From Misc

The television in the tour RV was dead when we came back from Steamboat. Wouldn't turn on. What was I going to do with my TV drug supply cut off?

My trusted companion (without whom this tour would not be possible, she chooses to stay behind the camera) suggested we take it back to the place we purchased it, Sam's Club. I haven't had much experience with returns at Sam's Club, I knew Costco would rock it and handle your problem, but Sam's?

Yep, Sam's. They were awesome. Thanks to the Boulder Sam's Club.

Question : Will Ford help me with my broken American truck? I think I am about to find out what kind of customer service Ford has.

Episode 7 -- Niwot Criterium -- Johnny B Comedy Bailout

2009-08-19T08:33:00.001-06:00

It's a day of bicycle racing in Niwot, Colorado as comedian Johnny Biscuit enjoys the sights and sounds. This episode is a video montage of the racing set to the music of Colorado favorite Opie Gone Bad, as recorded live at Boulder's Band on the Bricks.

Froze My Tail Off

2009-08-17T11:15:00.003-06:00

From Bear Lake 2 Boulder

I slept in my car a second night and froze my rabbit ears off! I didn't have money, and there was no room at the inn so we ended our day at the National Forrest Service campground outside of Rabbit Ears Pass.

We had a long day, driving from Dinosaur National Monument to Steamboat Springs, CO. When we got there we watched friends finish the Wild West Relay. It's a run of about 200 miles. Congratulations team Whistle Pigs!

Then we headed up to the Strawberry Hot Springs. Felt soooo good to soak in the warm mineral water.

After that we tried to find a place to park and sleep. That's when I started thinking about there really is no place to sleep if you haven't paid for it. We are free to walk around our cities but not to sleep in them. It was a weird feeling realizing that once I fell asleep in the wrong spot, there could be trouble.

Drove 12 miles out of town to the top of the pass and found a campground. $10. That's how I froze my tail and realized sleep is a funny thing. When I didn't get any.

More photos from this leg in the album Bear Lake 2 Boulder.

Sleep is a Funny Thing

2009-08-12T09:37:00.003-06:00

After sleeping in my car, I realized sleep is a funny thing. For starters, you can't just sleep anywhere, you have to sleep in approved sleeping places. There are lots of serious opinions tied up in sleep. How long, what time should you get up and the big sleep daily double question, with whom? Lots going on while you sleep, you thought you were resting!

From Bear Lake 2 Boulder

My head compared to dinosaur head. Strangely similar.

We headed down Highway 40 towards Dinosaur, Colorado. This is two-lane highway all the way to Steamboat. Two-lane highways feel dangerous with cars screaming towards you, but freeways feel dangerous when you are boxed in by 3 triple-trailers on a mission from the cargo Gods.

From Bear Lake 2 Boulder

The world stretches out in front of me through my windshield.

From Bear Lake 2 Boulder

Roadside attractions. You've heard of the Love Shack? This is the Freedom Shack. Just somebody's shed by the side of the road, no one to please but themselves. I love the freedom of the Freedom Shack.

From Bear Lake 2 Boulder

This bone was at the beginning of the trail I walked down to take the Freedom Shack pictures. Ironic, on not.

From Bear Lake 2 Boulder

Stopped at Craig, CO Kum & Go to replenish our fluids.

From Bear Lake 2 Boulder

Took a picture of a fallen road warrior.

We push on down the road toward Steamboat...

My tour is working brilliantly and failing stupendously at the same time. It works as long as I let go and accept what is happening and have gratitude rather than disappointment that it wasn't my plan. What happens contains unreal joys I never imagined, if I only will let go of what I was looking for and see what is there.

I signed on for an adventure, the definition of adventure : the outcome is unknown. I am definitely having an adventure.

I Slept In my Car

2009-08-11T18:42:00.004-06:00

When you travel at night and then sleep outdoors, waking up in the morning it can be startling. The end of my first day's drive from Bear Lake landed me here, Dinosaur National Monument. $10 for a campground fee, includes all the view you can eat.

I took this shot from my campground.

Let's recap. Left Bear Lake. Utah and drove to Logan, Utah through Logan Canyon.

The drive through Logan Canyon was idyllic. American Idyllic.

Stopped at Logan landmark, Fredrico's. Come for the ham and cheese, stay for the pizza! Thanks to Jim and the gang for lunch, and also to my bro for hooking me up. Us poor people love food. 50 years in the same location! Must be a reason.

I just liked this sign. Love old signs. This was in Logan.

Another shot of Logan Canyon.

Got to Dinosaur National Monument after dark. Woke up and went exploring. This is a shot of the back of one of my fellow RV traveler's van. This creature strapped to the ladder, dedicated friend or terrible accident?

The only one you need to impress is yourself!

Click here for my Picassa album for more pictures from the road.

How an Unexpected Trip Changed My Sleep

2009-08-10T11:41:00.001-06:00

You would not believe the things I have seen in the last few days. Driving across America on a 2 lane highway opens up my mind as I see things I never imagined. The beautiful strange world operated by individuals and their multiplicity of freaky ideas comes alive!

Cage fights and holistic health and fitness? Why not? Stuff like this is EVERYWHERE once you leave the committees and focus groups behind. Nothing polished here, just raw ideas. Small towns are awesome for their freedom to be radically uncool. Cut it loose and rock and roll, do whatever crazy thing you want, no one to impress except yourself.

Driving Tour of Bear Lake - Part 2

2009-08-06T22:34:00.003-06:00

30 years ago my friend Merlin was in a melodrama at the Pickleville Playhouse. It is still here serving up hot and tasty melodramas, with beans and beef picnic dinners. It is $17 for the play, and $35 for dinner and the play. It was sold out every night that we checked.

The old log cabin Pickleville Playhouse.

Just outside Rendezvous Beach lay the Bear Lake Monster, or what I could find for one. There are legends of a creature like the Loch Ness Monster living in the depths of Bear lake. This picture is a pontoon boat for rides around the lake with a paper mache recreation of the monster on the front. Scary.

This leg of the tour is going backwards from Ideal Beach toward Idaho. Here is a shot from the east side of the lake. It really is so beautiful up here. The colors are amazing.

The climbing tower from the Boy Scout Aquatics camp on the east side of the lake. Spent several nights with my boys here. Good memories.

This is the original homestead building of one of our friends whose family still owns skadiddles of land out there. Great, great, great grandpappy lived a hard life so they can have nice summer vacation land! And alfalfa farms.

So there you go, a drive around the lake. Such a beautiful place and a beautiful time of year to be here. Thanks to everyone who helped make this happen, thank you so much.

Driving Tour of Bear Lake - Part 1

2009-08-06T10:03:00.002-06:00

Small town America lives at Bear Lake. I took a drive around the lake, about 60 miles, and snapped pictures along the way. An old woman who lives in a shoe, Idaho, and the Bear Lake Monster await you!

This shot is out of order, it's the back (Idaho) side of the lake, but I wanted to get your attention. So beautiful.

A shot of our new tug vehicle and it's best friend, the gas pump. Pumping it old skool.

Seriously? We made it to Idaho!

Get your Lotto tickets! Just over the border from Utah is Fish Haven. No lottery in Utah, so living the letter of the law, Utahns drive to Idaho for their vices! The beer is full strength for the heathens too.

The last pay phone in America perhaps?

There was an old woman... Note to home owners, if you build a house like a shoe, everyone will look at your house.

Tomorrow I will post the rest of the pictures, finish the loop and show you the Bear Lake Monster!

Happy Thursday!

Corn Dog Heaven

2009-08-04T10:47:00.005-06:00

We all know what a hound dog is, but a corn dog? To me, "corndog" sounds like a slang term for life a bit cheesy, corny. I'm a bit corndog myself! If you like things simple, quick, dorky, silly and looking better than they actually are (like the corn dog) -- you are a corndog. If you like going to Chucky Cheese, you definitely full-on corndog. The question we must ask ourselves, what percentage corndog shall we be?

It has been a great festival weekend here in Bear Lake. The best part was hanging with my kids, who are not so much kids any more. The weather was great and we had sunny days chillin' by the lake, raspberry shakes, and a visit to the Raspberry Days festival. Festival, free. Chillin', free. Raspberry shakes, $4 each. Oh, and corn dogs, $2. Low-cost, high fun.

Real Men of Genius

2009-08-03T14:14:00.002-06:00

Here's to you, Mr. under 10 MPH beach cruiser. When you saw the passenger limit of "1" for your mini-bike you said, "Not in my town, this is a family place." So you set out to combine the best of bicycling with the piston pumping power of 50cc's of a single seat monster machine. Nothing can hold you or your little beach baby back. So here's to you Mr. Homemade Mini-Bike Child Trailer maker.

Recipe For Summer Fun

2009-07-31T16:29:00.003-06:00

Here's an easy recipe for summer fun, small town summer festivals. Go visit small towns when they get dressed up and have put out their "welcome" sign and you are likely to see lots of smiling faces. Here we are at the beginning of the Bear Lake Raspberry Days Festival. Sorry, no pig wrestling like Rawlins, Wyoming.

I can't believe we made it here! Thanks to all our friends who lent their support through this latest odyssey. Unbelievable. I got to experience the car-dying-in-a-busy-intersection joy and putting in an alternator under the lights of my friend's garage at 10:30 PM, but somehow we got here. Drove the length of Utah in one day!

It's beautiful and I am grateful for my good fortune. Hope all you have a great weekend. Looking forward to mine and the rodeo and pancake breakfast!

Mind Fu 2

2009-07-30T08:59:00.001-06:00

Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons. -- Woody Allen

Lowest Airline Fares Are Yours!

2009-07-29T13:15:00.005-06:00

Drop everything, airline fares tumble to their lowest cost! But you have to drop everything, including your expectations. Did you know the bathrooms in the Denver are tornado shelters? So when the poop hits the fan you hit the pooper!

Yesterday we flew stand-by from Denver to St. George so we can pick up our loaner replacement vehicle. Thank you to my friends who helped me negotiate those rapids. Left the house at 4:45 AM (seriously, thanks for that ride!) and drove to the airport. Got on a flight out at around 5 PM. Landed in SLC and got on a SkyWest propeller plane flight to St. George. In our room at our friend's house in St. George at about 10 PM.

Heading out soon, we will be driving the length of Utah all the way to the corner of Idaho, Utah and Wyoming to Raspberry Days in Bear Lake, Utah.

If you like what I am up to, I need ideas on how to get the tour moving and keep it going. Also need graphic design help. I am in a difficult business, how do you get money helping people think about slowing down? (I mean besides pharmaceuticals and cruises?) I need the help of smart people to make this work.

Johnny B Comedy Bailout -- Episode 6 -- Ignite Andrew Hyde

2009-07-28T00:26:00.007-06:00

Are Geeks today's leaders of pop culture? In this Episode, comedian Johnny B visits Ignite Boulder 5 in Boulder, Colorado, a public speaking event 'of sorts.' Johnny sits down for a chat Andrew Hyde, Community Director for TechStars.org. Seen are Ignite Boulder 5 clips, The Autumn Film and Andrew's thoughts on social media, business, and art.

This video is widescreen and doesn't fit my blog properly. Although you can watch it in the blog it will be cut off, to watch it full size click on this link and see it on YouTube:

Johnny B Comedy Bailout -- Episode 6 -- Ignite Andrew Hyde

Mind Fu

2009-07-27T09:58:00.002-06:00

Fish is the only food that is considered spoiled once it smells like what it is. -- P. J. O'Rourke.

UPDATE: SAVED $350 -- Now The $1500 Tune-Up

2009-07-24T16:52:00.005-06:00

This blog is a tiny, tiny, tiny piece of a BIG GIANT internet, and 100% of this blog. Much like our lives, on the scheme of things we are one tiny piece of 6 billion pieces, but what happens to us in our lives matters to us completely. We can have a big impact one on one.

Big thanks to Longmont Ford for saving me $350 in this situation. When I went to pick up the Ford F150 I asked them if I really had to pay for the new coil on the dead motor. You know what? They told me to come back in an hour and they would have it off. I did and they gave me the truck back with the old part N/C. THANK YOU LONGMONT FORD. That was awesome.

So now I have my terminally ill Ford F150 hospicing in a driveway with its $1500 tune-up. Next step get to St. George, Utah. Then back to Colorado with the sweet Suburban. Somewhere in there I am supposed to be having a 3 day weekend with the kids. Keeping my fingers crossed.

Happy 24th to all my pioneer buddies. I am missing you at the Derby. Have a great weekend!

Makin' Money Yo

2009-07-23T22:23:00.002-06:00

I made money on the internet and I can show you how to do it too! In 3 short days I was able to make $.59. That's right, 59 cents. That's over 19 cents a day! How did I do it? Connecting my readers with the products they are looking for. How do you Do-Rag?

Actually, I monetized my blog and put Google Ads on my page. Someone clicked on something they liked I guess, Google credited me $.59. I guess there is money to be made off of people spending money. People pay for marketing, not content. Content is simply a platform for marketing, where the real money is.

Oddly enough, I probably made that $.59 because more people have been visiting my site since I started talking about my Ford engine problems.

Called Ford Corporate today. The girl was actually friendly and took a lot of time to collect my information but I couldn't come up with a few pieces so I have to call back tomorrow and start over. I posted my experience on a couple of Fiberglass RV boards I visit and people are reacting, they don't seem to happy about what I have described. Soon I will contact the local news and see if they are interested in getting the word out. This is just wrong.

A New Motor Costs $8500

2009-07-22T18:53:00.005-06:00

The dealer wants about $8500 to put a new motor in our 2004 Ford F150. The garage in Orem, UT wants about $5500, plus it's $400 to tow it back. I just want to crawl in a hole. Our tour blew up with piston number one. We are dead in the water. But, my dead Ford has an awesome $1800 tune-up!

So now what? This certainly makes the tour story more interesting, I'll give you that. Put a man in a hole, get him out; isn't that the basic plot line of every movie script. He's safe! He's in trouble! He's safe! No! Now REAL trouble! I'm in the trouble part.

The good news, I have some awesome friends and family. I have been offered a SWEET 1994 Chevy Suburban for use by a good friend, just have to get to St. George, Utah to get it. My little trailer is parked in an awesome family place and can be for now, so that's cool. I have food, and good lovin' still is free! Can I get an Amen?

Hey Johnny. What? Lighten up, choose happy.

Oh yeah.

The $1800 Ford F150 Tune-up

2009-07-21T11:05:00.006-06:00

The $1800 Ford F150 tune-up is a big problem, but there is a way to possibly hold the cost down if you know AHEAD of time what you are walking into.

The F150 repair scene continues...

"What? You thought I was done smacking you around? Hah, hah, hah!!! Whack! Take that! And this! And some of this over here! Bammo! Now tell me you like me!"

"TELL ME YOU LIKE ME! What, you want some more?! TELL ME YOU LIKE ME!!!"

"I like you."

"NOT YOU, THE TRAILER BOY!!!"

CUT

END SCENE

-------------

There is a Technical Service Bulletin out about this, but here is the short version. Because of the manufacturing design of the head, Ford has created a unique spark plug ($18) for only this engine. These plugs become WELDED to the head over time and should be changed every 50,000 miles. If you are lucky and use solvents and time you can get them out and your tune-up is $300. If you are unlucky (me) the spark plugs break during removal and depending on the number and type of break, the dollars can skyrocket to the point where you are pulling the motor and removing the head to perform a tune-up. Your kid didn't want braces, did she?

Within driving 500 miles the motor was running rough again so we took it to the Longmont, CO Ford dealer. They wanted another $300 for a bad coil. OK, do it! They call us later because it is still running rough. Apparently I lost a cylinder they tell me, and now I need a new $5500 ($8500 at the dealer) motor for my $5000 truck with 78,000 miles on it. So...on top of my $1500 tune-up repair bill they wanted $300 for the coil so the dead motor will not run better.

With $1800 tune-up finally finished, now they tell me it's time for a new motor.

So the tour is now making an extended stop in Boulder. Luckily my house is like an escalator which when it stops it becomes stairs, still useful. It is just here in Boulder, Co. for a while, it still could move with juice.

I am using American vehicles for my American tour, it sure would be nice if it was just my comedy sucking. This isn't funny. My Deadliest Catch was a Ford.

Ford F150 Repair Deathgrip

2009-07-20T08:35:00.004-06:00

After driving through Wyoming our 2004 Ford F150 was running rough, so we took it in to the shop. $1500 later we left with a tune-up. There is a serious problem in the manufacturing of the head, buyer beware!

Above is a picture of me in the death grip of car repairs, either that or a roadside gorilla statue in Rock Springs, Wyoming. (Notice the hay bales?)

To top it off, when we returned to Colorado after our run to Salt Lake City and our $1500 repair bill, it is running rough again! So we are getting it to the dealer here and keeping our fingers crossed. This is no way to run a tour. We are trying to make it back to Utah for Pioneer Days and the Heber Demolition Derby.

$1500 for 8 new spark plugs and you have to take it to the dealer to get the plugs out? This engine has a head that makes spark plug removal for a tune-up major surgery. They break off in the head! Built Ford Tough-Luck!

A quick thank you to those who made donations to the tour recently (you know who you are!) You have no idea how crucial your help has been, no only in providing funds which we desperately need, but also in emotional support. It means a lot to know someone wants me to keep rolling!

Johnny B Comedy Bailout -- Episode 5 -- That Erie Feeling

2009-07-16T08:59:00.003-06:00

In Episode 5 of the Johnny B Comedy Bailout, I put an ad on Craigslist offering to do a comedy show for essentially gas money and tips for anyone who would like a show. I was contacted by Michelle and I performed at their party. But wait, there is a surprise! Thanks to David and Michelle and all their friends out there in Erie, Colorado. You guys were great, I had an awesome time. Hope you enjoy it too!

This video is widescreen and doesn't fit my blog properly. Although you can watch it in the blog it will be cut off, to watch it full size click on this link and see it on YouTube:

Johnny B Comedy Bailout -- Episode 5 -- That Erie Feeling (Full Size)

Salt Lake City Openhouse 2009

2009-07-15T12:40:00.008-06:00

I returned Monday to Salt Lake City for the Meeting Professionals International national convention open house. I did "man-on-the-street" video reporting which was recorded for later editing and also projected live on the big screens. Here is a quick shot I took of the headliner Macy Gray. Also featured were the talented Jason Hewlett, and David Osmond and my new friend, announcer Frank Fredricks.

Big thanks to Cornerstone Show Foundation for the invitation. I have done many shows with Cornerstone and they always get it right, and Monday's Openhouse '09 was no exception. A big thanks to the other sponsors of the evening, Ogio (thanks for the great laptop bag, and check out their man Cam McQueen on MTV's Nitro Circus and Fuel TV's Thrillbillies -- see the Thrillbilies Hulu or Cam in this insane video of him doing a back-flip on an electric motorcycle on YouTube. We talked about pulling the trailer behind his monster truck off a ramp after the tour. Hah!), Sundance, Wasatch Breweries, Squatters Breweries, Utah Food Services, Vodka 7000, High West Wiskey, Ferrari Color, Capta-Vision, Suite Access, Vox Marketing Group, Poll Sound.

I am sure I am missing someone and I apologize. It was a big event with lots of people in attendance. Great food and beverages, great entertainment and the lighting/staging was awesome! Thanks again to Chad and Cornerstone for pulling this event together.

Hold

2009-07-13T07:38:00.002-06:00

The next Johnny B Comedy Trailer Tour video coming soon. We have been traveling and didn't quite get 'er wrapped up. Soon though. Soon.

Ignite Boulder 5

2009-07-10T11:07:00.005-06:00

I mentioned earlier my night at Ignite Boulder. Let me tell the story a bit now that they have begun to post the videos of the presentations.

This all started for me when I was searching for info on transcoding for YouTube an episode of my Trailer Tour video show. It's getting better, but seriously... anyways, I searched for info and I found the info on Kendall Media Group site, who happen to be in the Boulder area. They mentioned their work on the upcoming Ignite, and it was in 2 nights! We decided to go. When I bought tickets on-line I saw them asking for volunteers, so we went early to volunteer and meet everyone.

They really didn't need our help. There were lots of people there in a great mood. I tried to introduce myself to people and one guy I met was Andrew Hyde, one of the organizers and the MC of the evening. We briefly told him our story that night, about the tour etc.

Anyway, Boulder Ignite blew our socks off. It is obvious they are on to something here, their attendance has swelled with every event and with good reason. It is one-on-one rock and roll science meets art in a celebration of the scientartist. Are you kidding me? They openly heckled brilliant minds, it was awesome. It was alive and explosive.

Seriously, I have been a comedian for the last 20 years and this is as good as live communication gets. This is way better than you will get in a comedy club, especially if you are looking for a dose of intelligence or science with your fun.

More often than not, way more often, these speakers hit some very high notes. If you want an interactive, hyperactive, intelligent, base, fun, cheap night of possibility thinking, this is not to be missed.

The bands after were a nice touch too. What I heard of The Autumn Film was excellent. The bar was open and tech was in full force as we watched real-time Tweets about the coming moment of Ignite starting on the giant screen. It was surreal.

You can see the video of the presentations! Here is the link to one of my favorites!

David Walton- How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Accept that a Googolplex is a Really Big Number (Language)

So, after all this was over and we were able to get Andrew to sit down on camera for the Trailer Tour camera and lay out some great thoughts for us. Look for that interview in Episode 6 of the Trailer Tour. His interview is awesome. Seriously, seriously, awesome.

Episode 5 of the Johnny B Comedy Bailout Trailer Tour on Monday! I've seen it, it's fun and crazy. I did a put an ad up on Craigslist and said I would do a show for essentially gas money and tips, anywhere. Episode 5 is what happened.

Have a great weekend!

The Price of Fame is Too High

2009-07-07T10:12:00.006-06:00

Here is a picture of a young Johnny Biscuit shaking hands with Papa Joe Jackson. It was taken in the green room area of the Maxim hotel in Las Vegas. The Maxim had a comedy show that put a lot of emphasis on the MC, so the had 3-4 MC's they used exclusively. I was one of them so I was there many weeks for many shows.

At the time, Vegas scheduled short comedy shows but more of them. You could do 14-21 shows a week. Met lots of interesting people over the years that I worked there.

Joe Jackson brought a show to the Maxim that he scheduled in between the twice-nightly comedy shows. So we were on at 7, his show 8:30 our next show 9 and his late show 10:30. And what was Joe Jackson's show? A topless revue! Thanks to Joe Jackson I got to find out what bored naked showgirls look like backstage. The illusion and the reality... uh, well.

BTW, The reason I am looking away is I used to do this when I took my picture with celebrities. Like I am so busy but," OK, just one picture Joe Jackson." So they look at the camera, I look away. Oddly enough, the only one to notice in all the years I did it was Mary Lou Retton. And my pal Marie Osmond (who LOVES practical jokes) was in on a lot of it too, helping me get shots.

Bike Ride

2009-07-06T11:26:00.003-06:00

Hope you survived the 4th intact. Why is it that we celebrate freedom with what sounds like a full weekend of urban warfare? My neighbors put enough ordinance in the air in two nights that it would seriously dissuade any invader without at least a small army. Fuel it all with alcohol, God Bless America!

Before all that I went for a bike ride. My bicycle had been sitting in a storage shed with flat tires gathering dust. Before we left for Colorado I pulled it out, dusted it off and repaired the flats. I have been riding several times now, the other night we rode around a small lake.

See this here plaque? It tells about this unique sculpture by the lake in Longmont, Co. Art in public places. Steve Jensen. This piece.

There is a bike trail that goes all around this lake and people are walking their dogs, riding bikes, hiking... it's awesome! Just some awesome quality of life stuff around here that is FREE!

I didn't even know about this art piece, I was just riding my bike on this trail and then BAM! There it was! I took these pictures with a little Aiptek pocket video camera I carry. It will shoot stills too, not killer ones, but good enough to get these shots. I try to always carry a camera just for things like this.

I also rode my bike in the Niwot 4th of July parade. Got there early and decorated my bike. I didn't know anyone when I started but met some cool people by the end. Just a small town parade, they had the stuff for you to decorate your bike. It was super cool, fun and once again FREE. We shot video, we'll have more for you later when you are not tired from the 4th!

Here I am looking sensitive and pensive at dusk by the lake. Deep thoughts.

I put up several shots of this sculpture because it looks so good and so different with the way the light hits. I guess that's the point of sculpture, it's 3-D!!! I love how this place puts value on art and artists. I love it.

Chief Niwot Says Happy 4th!

2009-07-03T14:44:00.006-06:00

Freedom! We celebrate freedom on the 4th! Last night I got my first taste of freedom of speech in a long time when I attended the Boulder Ignite #5 at the Boulder Theater. Wow. Wow. Bow wow wow. Big thanks to everyone to put that together and presented. What an awesome night. I will post more about this later, including a link where you will be able to see what I saw. The people couldn't have been nicer, and a special thanks to Andrew Hyde for his hosting.

Left Ignite to be surrounded by 100 plus decorated bikers telling me "Happy Thursday!" Freedom is alive and well in Boulder I am happy to report.

Near Boulder is Niwot, Colorado. Chief Niwot was a chief during the mid 1800's when the white settlers began coming into Indian lands. Early on he figured out the whites weren't going away so they better make friends, and he did.

As the story is told, he was well loved and that is why the town is named after him, in fact. But the sad part of the story is his white friends killed him and about 180 of his people at the Sandcreek Massacre which started the 30 years of the Indian Wars.

In downtown Niwot, Boulder artist Eddie Running Wolf was commissioned to turn two red willow trees into a wood carvings. This is the result.

The detail is amazing.

Powerful form and shape too.

When I think of July 4th I think about the Indians. How many hundreds of years did they live here keeping the land in such beautiful condition. The birth of America is probably not something they consider as a sentimental favorite on their history hit parade.

Will a day like that come for my people?

Interesting message carved into the wood.

You Gotta Getcha One of These!

2009-07-02T15:04:00.007-06:00

I just got my mail from the past month and I have a tour update and correction. Our first corporate gift came from the good people over at Maverik Country Stores. Seems I have had a G-Card courtesy of Scott Shakespeare sitting in my mailbox since June 3rd! So thanks! Wow. Thanks.

They sent me the card wrapped in a picture printed out from a show I did at their national convention a while ago. It was a nice personal touch, made me smile. But that's how I remember working with them. Good people, treated me like a human being above and beyond paying me for the work I did for them, if you know what I mean.

A while ago I went to their website and sent a customer comment about being on this tour and told them how much I appreciate their stores as I travel. They contacted me and said thanks for the comment and we have a little something for you.

I love Maverik Country Stores, you can see one I stopped at in Evanston, Wyoming in Episode 2 of the Johnny B Comedy Bailout. The stores have a little bakery and they make a lot of the food that they sell right there. Smells good. They also have a good selection of beverages, coffees and hot chocolates, yogurt -- whatever. They are clean, well-lit, well staffed and their gas prices are usually as good as I can find. I like the way they do business and I look for their locations when I look for gas.

Side note, I bought my brother the BIGGEST, WIDEST piece of jerky I have ever seen at the Maverik by the Provo Towne Mall last year. It was so big it had a brand on the jerky, like it was the side of a cow. I gave it to him for Christmas and he loved it! One of my tender Johnny B memories of Maverik.

Check them out if you haven't, go back again sooner if you have. They gave gas to the Tour!

THANKS MAVERIK!!! THANKS SCOTT!!! I'll be using this to come back to Utah for Raspberry Days!

Depends Upon How You Look At It

2009-06-30T14:23:00.008-06:00

Driving home from flying with David I noticed this artwork at the Lafayette Public Library and stopped to take a look.

This is the same part of the artwork standing back and to the side a bit.

Here it is again from the other side.

Here's what it looks like taking the long view. The entire "photograph" is made up pf tiny pieces of tile. Standing with it in your face, the tiny pieces that make up the work appear almost random and meaningless.

Every now and then when I think about my life I feel I owe people a mass apology. Man, I have done a lot of things wrong. It weighs on me. Dude, seriously, I am sorry. I know.

I can think of times and events that didn't go very well, didn't go as I hoped. I can think of times when my natural man didn't listen, said things I didn't really believe, acted impulsively and without enough respect or regard for others. I can think of times I misjudged, and other times I was just plain stupid. I can think of plenty of reasons to crawl in a hole and disappear out of shame.

"You're right! I suck!" I want to agree. But then I think, "So do you sometimes. So do we all." Why can't we just accept each other as imperfect, bound to make more mistakes, accept our own flaws and work together? Maybe because if we attack others first they will be so busy defending themselves that maybe they won't notice our flaws. You have rights! You may be entitled to a cash award! I always think low self-esteem when someone is always on the attack. A happy dog doesn't bark.

I do feel flawed. But I accept that despite my mistakes I need to keep going, need to make more mistakes. There will be even more reasons for people to be upset with me, because as long as I am alive I am imperfect. Imperfection is my state of being. But my glory is when I transcend the gravitation pull of my own suck vortex and something beautiful happens. And very often it happens simply because I tried, not because I am genius.

Alexander Fleming discovered penicillin because he didn't clean up after himself properly. German scientist Wilhelm Conrad discovered x-rays because he wanted to see if cathode rays could escape from a glass tube covered in cardboard, he wasn't trying to take pictures of bones. His mistaken idea led to something much bigger.

I am excited that I have pumped many people up and given them happiness in my lifetime. I am sorry I have disappointed people and let them down. Both exist simultaneously. I just hope I can find enough support so I can eat, and hang on long enough to make some really, really good mistakes. I mean genius discoveries.

Johnny B Comedy Bailout -- Episode 4 -- The Art of Richard Ferguson

2009-06-29T15:31:00.004-06:00

Hello trailer tour fans! It's Episode 4 of the Johnny B Comedy Bailout. Part of my plan for this tour is to interview the people who live and work in the places I visit. It has taken me a while to get going but here is the first installment. I met Richard by posting an ad on Craigslist. I said I was looking to interview artists/performers about art. Here is the result!

BTW, If you know anyone interesting (whatever their passion) that I should meet and interview let me know.

Tour Takes Flight

2009-06-29T14:06:00.005-06:00

It's me and David, host of the latest Johnny B Comedy Bailout Tour stop. He and and his wife Michelle were having a work/friend party and invited me to perform. They were great hosts and treated us like welcome friends. I don't want to give away the plot before I make the movie, but this is one to remember.

The next video episode will feature this tour stop. Don't miss it!

Speaking of episodes, Episode 3 is rendering right now and I will be posting it later today. Obviously I am interested in performing and having fun, but I am also fascinated by people and their passions. I go off the funny script in Episode 3 to sit down with a local artist.

One of the big elements I hoped to cultivate during the tour before I even began was interviewing the people that live and work in the places I visit. I think everyone has a story, and many are quite extraordinary. I see a vibrant world that I don't see reflected in commercial media, and I would like to capture some of that and share some of it.

I am looking to meet people who have a passion. Ideas?

Hey! Big exciting news! We got our first corporate "swag" for the tour. Mark Adamson at Flying J sent me a case of these "Koozies" to share on the tour. Thanks Flying J! I had sent them a comment at their website about being on the road and what a valuable resource their stores are for RV travelers. And they are!

You try finding an RV dump when you are in a place you don't know. Find a Flying J and you may have just found one! Plus they have a funky trucker accessory store. I love to see all the stuff the road warriors want. Their gas is always a good price too. Anyway, check them out if you haven't. They contacted me from my customer comment and sent me the Koozies! Thanks Mark! And thanks Flying J!

Get To The Point

2009-06-22T09:22:00.002-06:00

What do you mean, certain death? Quit beating around the bush!

While visiting Colorado I have seen some of the craziest signs. I have never seen signs so pointed and ominous. Certain Death? Plague? "You mother doesn't love you!" has to be next!

Wouldn't you love it if the people in your life said exactly what they meant? No you wouldn't! We like the little social lubrications that white lies afford us, we can slip and slide on the meaning of things as we please. Some of the problems become people don't quite believe us when we ARE telling the truth, or on difficult subjects they immediately think what we said is doubly bad because we always hedge on the hard things. And the worst communication? When WE start to believe our own BS.

I love the simplicity of this sign.

Communication is teaching... teaching other people who we are and what to expect from us. Does what we say and do match? How well? Why should we be upset when they don't believe us, when that is what we taught them to do?

I know people who say what they mean. Not only are they clear and truthful, they are precise in their language to limit misunderstanding. At first it can seem abrupt and shocking, after a while it becomes a blessing, you always know where you stand. The awesome communicators are the ones who add understanding, thought and patience to the mix, they don't just blurt out whatever Twitter their brain just sent them.

We have so many means of communication that I sense a sloppiness in communication growing. Phone calls, email, texting, logos -- communication stripped down. Easier to mislead with a text than looking in your eyes, intentional or not. And try training your dog over the phone.

As the speed of technology increases, the speed of people stays the same.

Before technology gave us the tools we struggled just to communicate. Now that we can communicate, what do we do?

Plague suspected?

Johnny B's Comedy Bailout -- Episode 3 -- Underwater Hockey

2009-06-16T20:02:00.005-06:00

Hey Trailer Tour fans, it's time for another episode of the Johnny B's Comedy Bailout Trailer Tour Show. In Episode 3 I visit the Boulder, Colorado underwater hockey team to see what the sport is all about.

Big thanks to Philip Hickey and Zak Schidmt and all the team for their help, and for opening their sport up to me. It was a lot of fun, even for a marginal swimmer like me.

Check out the video.

Giddie Up!

2009-06-12T15:30:00.002-06:00

Yee haw! Howdy partners! Seeing as how I am in Colorado, the home of the Rockies and the beginning of the Old West, I took the opportunity offered me to do some horseback riding! I haven't ridden for years and it was great!

My trusty stead is Athena, the Greek Goddess of wisdom, war, the arts, industry, justice and skill. Indeed.

On the way to the stable I saw this sign for "perfectionist" auto detailing. (I blurred the phone number.) They would have liked to have a really good sign, but this one is good enough I guess. You also get your handwritten receipt on a drink napkin.

I cannot describe how much it has been raining here in Colorado. I think every day I have blogged about it and then every day it rains even more. And hail. Enough hail that they have to get the snowplows out to clean the road. What? June what?

I am not a "cutesy" guy but baby horses... I love their little wobbly legs. They prance around like they weigh 23 pounds, springing into the air randomly. Wouldn't it be great if full-grown horses moved the same?

Red barn. I guess some places do look like postcards. There is plenty to do out here, we are having fun exploring the area. We have scheduled some shoots this weekend that should give us some great video to share with you.

So go out and enjoy your weekend. And remember the wise words of Will Rogers, "Always drink upstream from the herd."

Cheers!

Boulder

2009-06-10T11:48:00.003-06:00

Been out shooting footage for Episode 3 of the Trailer Tour Show. I got some great footage of the Cottonwood seeds and their snow-like drift to the ground. Above is a still shot where you can kind of see it.

There is much to like about this area. It is not crammed with people, there is a lot of open space where there are people, and there seems to be a real awareness of the value of lifestyle beyond the Mall-movie theaters-chain store.

The fields are exploding with flowers. It seems like it rains every day, so the flowers are fields are bursting with color. It hasn't even really made it past the 70's in temperature here lately.

I wouldn't say I am a flower photographer but how can I resist these? I love spring.

I get to see the world every day, watch it change, in a variety of locations. Love it!

Even the alien weeds are thriving!

Getting some good footage out here, will have another episode soon. We have picked up some work in this week that should allow me to get the tour moving along. (kinda stalled in May.) Granted I haven't done the free comedy I intended to do when I started, (had to eat) but I am in the middle of something big for sure. My job is to get people smiling and thinking, I am positive my tour has had that effect on some people.

I am learning a lot about myself and people, money and society. I am living a big adventure for a year and when I get done I will tell my story. I would love it if I found a way to make it bigger, I still feel pinned down by a lack of resources, but maybe that's the story I am here to find out. I jumped into this to see what I would find, not reach a goal.

Spring Babies

2009-06-08T17:05:00.003-06:00

The Starling babies are venturing out of the nest.

This one took up a perch on my bike.

This is a baby miniature horse that is being boarded with my friend's horses.

You can get an idea of the size when compared with the sheep.

Here is the entire herd of tiny horses.

Spring has sprung and all the new life is coming alive. Fringe benefit of the trailer tour is seeing nature's patterns, they are just outside my door.

The weather here in Colorado thunders and rolls. Great clouds move across the sky, rain starts and stops almost as fast as it begins. Powerful thunderstorms suddenly drench you. Funnel clouds touched down in 5 places near here yesterday.

Glorious!

Colorado

2009-06-04T23:26:00.003-06:00

Mustache cat, I like it.

Fat Tire.
Mile High Wiener. Rockies Dog.

The Cottonwood seeds are falling like snow.

Appearing live...

Johnny B Comedy Bailout -- Episode 2

2009-06-01T21:30:00.005-06:00

It's Episode 2 of the Johnny B Comedy Bailout Trailer Tour Show!

I have been taking pictures, writing and blogging about the tour to tell the story. Decided to kick it up a notch and do video. Now you can see and hear the story!

(Video plays wrong aspect ratio inside the blog, click on the picture and view on YouTube to see correctly.)

Travel Time

2009-05-29T12:04:00.005-06:00

As we drive across Wyoming the AM radio offers Sean Hannity on two channels and Glen Beck on another. When those shows are over they switch, Glen Beck on two channels, Hannity on one.

Windmills are EVERYWHERE! That's great and everything, but I still haven't heard anyone talking about using less electricity as a strategy. These things are huge. To me a few are interesting, a lot are start looking like giant razor knives spinning through the sky. Kinda creepy. I see them, but I usually see a small minority actually turning.

Casita vs The Motorhome, Little America, Wyoming, Hotel and Truck Stop. Nicest bathrooms I've seen. All the old people were getting giant ice cream cones.

Did you enjoy the Memorial Day traffic? Is that the only time you experience the open road is on high usage days, because its a whole different world weekdays and evenings. It must benefit someone for us all to try to do the same thing at the same time, like holidays. But I think if we all spread it out more we could enjoy it more without needing any more. We already have it, it's sitting there most of the time.

Can you imagine waking up every day to this? Someone does.

The early gold standard of the RV experience, Airstream. Saw this beauty shimmerin' by the road.
Next to our parking spot in Colorado, an opportunist is caught on camera. (after I chased it!)

Onward to Colorado!

2009-05-28T13:34:00.006-06:00

Back on the road, the glorious road, the world got big again.

I haven't posted in a while because things have been tough here lately. Long story short, was camping in a horse pasture allergic to everything there, got truck stuck, broken water line, helped family members move, holiday, main computer died, and just plain tired.

Starling returning to its nest near our RV.

Learning a lot from my various experiences living in an RV full-time. Here's what I learned from staying in a horse pasture for a week; the current Christmas celebrations have nothing to do with being born in a manger. Christmas is scrubbed clean and full of special treats! Candy canes, chocolates, songs and celebration! If you celebrated it by sleeping in a manger to really remember what it is all about, I don't think it would be the same holiday hit.

Here's a spider from the pasture that moved into our gas can!

This is looking West toward Utah from I-80 in Wyoming. In the distance you can see the snow-capped Uinta Mountains.

We got back on the road and headed for Colorado. Only made it as far as Evanston, Wyoming before dark. We tanked up at the local Maverik (your adventure stop!) and camped out in the WalMart parking lot. Got up in the morning and got back on the road.

So good to be rolling down the highway. When I start moving through the world I see things. Like this dude (and I think that is the correct term here) and his whatever. (below) I don't know what or why this is but I saw it and it exists. There was no one following him in a van as he re-created something or raised awareness or funds for this or that, I think this is just how he likes to roll.

Maybe it is Leonard Budweiser, the Budweiser they don't talk about, and his idea of the Budweiser team.

Sharing the road with the Taylor Swift semi, leaving Utah after her triumphant sold-out Salt Lake City concert, full of cash.

It's a perfect time of year for an I-80 drive across Wyoming. It is beautiful and green, lots of antelope and blue sky. And the horse crap outside my window is moving, not waiting for me. Yes!

Into The Mountains

2009-05-19T10:41:00.003-06:00

OK, the reason I fell in love with Utah when I first came here is because 15 minutes from your home you can be camped in the mountains and fishing. If you've read this blog you saw where I grew up. Water and trees turn me on.

After the yard sale we headed into the hills, we found a beautiful campsite next to the stream. The landscape is coming alive. The flowers are blooming, the trees have their leaves, the grass is green, the creek is full, and creature after creature crawls along in the sun.

This little guy is one of many little caterpillars that where falling out of the trees into our hair. Because we weren't on a schedule or using Lysol disinfectant to clean everything, we decided to sit and watch them crawl around.

These things were so strong, agile and it seemed making decisions. I swear to you on a stack of whatever you like people to swear on that this thing would raise up and look at the camera when my trusted companion was trying to take its picture.

The landscape here is unbelievably green.

Patches of sun streak through fractured openings in the leaves to spotlight flowers.

I don't know why this tree is spotted like this, I didn't even notice it until my companion pointed it out. It certainly is unusual.

One thing I love about nature is that it is constant, it doesn't matter if the stock market is up or down, the bird still fly, the clouds still move across the sky, whether you are rich or poor. In the natural world we are all equal.

Yard Sale

2009-05-18T13:56:00.003-06:00

I don't understand Twitter. I have 83 followers, two stick out at first glance. One is Gov. Schwarzenegger (that's what the Twitter name says) and one is Ken Seeley, lead interventionist for A & E's "Intervention."

What?!? OK, the interventionist I get, there are plenty of people who think I need help, I live in a freakin' trailer, I get it. But the Gov? Does Arnold get up every day and think, "When I get a free second I am going to see what Johnny Biscuit is up to today. He cracks me up." Yeah, I'm sure he keeps up on me.

Here is a scene from our lovely yard sale. Did you see the beautiful sign I made out of tape and plywood? Stunning.

My Pops is lightening the titles in his space library. Cosmic Catastrophes has got to go!

Here's how a yard sale works... TV doesn't sell. Box of crappy plastic mismatched hangers SOLD!
The treasures of dreams past.

We rounded up a few dollars, I would call the yard sale a success! Plus we cleared a bunch of stuff out of the storage. I have never really been a yard sale guy, but it was fun. Fun to watch who came with dreams of their own for your old treasures.

And the one thing I learned about yard sales. IT'S OVER BY 9 AM! Motivated buyers descend half an hour before you start, and they know what they are looking for. Watch out! Didn't even have time to drag the stuff out front. People where in the back yard and wandering around looking at Pops real stuff asking how much it was!

You have the whole summer ahead of you. Perhaps a yard sale this year? Invite me, I'll come play the uke for your customers!

Comedy Clip : Motivational Speaker - Catch & Release

2009-05-15T13:29:00.005-06:00

Ah the weekend!

And what better to start the weekend than a little comedy. Here is another short clip of me doing the hilarious comedy to get you in the mood for relaxing!

Tomorrow is the big garage sale, wish me luck. I have a 5 seater Water Rocket that I am going to put out on the lawn for my, "What's that?" marketing tool. I hope people don't show up at 5 AM! They have already started calling.

Hope you can relax and enjoy yourself this weekend. Breathe deep, relax.

Marketing

2009-05-14T10:35:00.010-06:00

Welcome new visitors sent this way by Shawn. Thanks for coming, hope you enjoy your visit. I appreciate her spreading the word about my adventure. Thanks Shawn!

See this motorcycle? What kind do you think it is? I saw it parked in front of this antique store when I was visiting Randsburg, CA a while ago, and I pulled over to look at it. As I did another guy walked up and started talking to the owner, Charlie, about the bike. He wanted to know about it too. My first guess was it ran on compressed air. The two of us stood there and listened to Charlie.

Charlie told us exactly what kind of bike it was, it was one he put together out of parts he had sitting around the shop. "It's a real motor," he said, "but no, it doesn't work. I just put it together to get people to stop and ask what it was," as we stood there having our question answered after stopping to ask what kind of bike it was.

"Take a look around," he said, "got all kinds of interesting things in there." Then we walked into his store, the best little ore house in Randsburg antiques store. I wonder why he calls his store that?

Charlie knows marketing.

I don't know how to market myself, how to sell myself as a product. I did a good job marketing my comedy club, that wasn't me. But talking about how great I am, while I enjoy it personally and inside my head, doesn't go easily for me as a professional pursuit.

In the "business of show" they spend more selling the movie than making the movie. My lack of marketing myself is a flaw that I have that is hurting the work that I do because I don't get ideas properly funded. I am so interested in the ideas, not the business, that the marketing gets left till last. It's something I need to work on.

As I look around me I see financially successful people typically are not about ideas, but business. Ideas not for the beauty of the ideas, but ideas turned into sales. Now you've got something! Early in my career I was lucky to work with smart business people who allowed my to just focus on my ideas. Now I do it all!

Anyway, I am stuck here in Utah and it is driving me nuts! I have so many places I would like to be visiting but I don't have the money to move the rig down the road. I sold my car, I am having a yard sale this weekend, my trusted companion has been doing substitute work. Hopefully we will get together another pile and get moving again soon.

At least when I finally do get to tell my story it will be a good one!

What Is The Universe Trying to Tell Me?

2009-05-13T13:28:00.009-06:00

This is seriously freaky, it came to me as I was falling asleep last night.

This a picture from my blog post dated 4/17/09.

Here is a picture I took at the Dodger game April 16th. That is my Dodger dog and that is Manny Ramirez in the background.

On May 07, 2009 Manny was suspended from baseball for 50 games.

Here is the article about his suspension from baseball for the use of what he said was an erectile dysfunction drug.

I was sitting in Larry King's seat when I took this picture. Was this a message for Larry about his beloved Dodgers?

What is the universe trying to tell me if I will only listen? FREAKY.

Comedy Clip : G Strings

2009-05-12T14:14:00.003-06:00

People have asked me for clips of my comedy, so I sat down with the editor and pulled this little nugget out for you. The Aristocrats.

Attack

2009-05-11T11:19:00.004-06:00

Here I am ready to attack the swine flu.

Actually, here I am ready to attack the yard work for Pops. My dad's yard was in need of some brawn, and I am here to be a good son and do the job.

What is it about plants that we choose the ones that take all the work to enjoy? If you do nothing your yard will be covered in plants, but no, those plants aren't good enough so we have to go to work all summer talking care of the plants that are good enough. And before we can do that we have to go around and pick up the poo of the animals not good enough to use the toilet but good enough to be our best friend. You want to pick up my poo? But you will do it for a dog?

Weeds are everywhere and grow without encouragement or attention. Shouldn't we admire the weeds and their tenacity instead of the tulips and their neediness? No, we admire the plants that need us. I think I have seen that behavior in people's feelings towards other people to. We say we want to be around strong, independent people, but how do we feel important if they don't actually need us?

Sometimes I think if weeds are aliens sent to Earth they have found the perfect vehicle to slowly take control of our planet. What if the weeds are just waiting for a signal from the Mothership to morph and attack. Why is it always machines that go bonkers an threaten our world in sci-fi?

It's these plants that are after me today.